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"Good grief, what kind of wedding night talk did you have with your mother?" Eleanor asked, sounding absolutely scandalized. Considering the icy coldness of the Baroness, Irene's mother, Grace couldn't imagine the woman sharing that kind of information either.
"She didn't really tell me much of anything," Irene said, shrugging her shoulders. "I just do whatever Hugh wants me to. He likes it when I use my mouth. It's quite a lot of fun, actually."
"Oh no, no," Eleanor said, shaking her head as she put her hands over her ears. "I'm not listening... I think my ears are bleeding!" All of them fell over giggling at her antics and the horrified expression on her face. Grace pressed her hand to her stomach, trying to control her mirth as tears sparked in her eyes she was laughing so hard. She'd never seen Eleanor so perturbed.
When they finally regained control over themselves, she couldn't contain her curiosity. "But really... what do you do?"
"Oh no, don't ask them about it," Eleanor said, giving Cynthia a stern look. "I can't tell you the amount of trouble I got into when I tried it with Edwin. He was sure that I had learned it from some other man."
It was like a thundercloud suddenly shutting out the sun. Grace's chest went tight inside, as if her rib cage had wrapped around her heart and squeezed. While Edwin's suspicions of Eleanor were definitely without merit, if Grace and Alex were to reconcile and she was to try something so new with him... would he be upset? The others were exchanging glances, and Eleanor looked incredibly regretful of what she'd said.
"I'm sorry, Grace," she murmured, reaching out and grabbing Grace's hand, a forlorn expression on her face. "I wasn't thinking... I just spoke..."
Giving her friend a wan smile, Grace patted Eleanor's hand. "I'm alright. I know you didn't mean anything by it, and you're right." She gave a brittle little laugh. "With all my lovers, you'd think I would have been the one with the most experience!"
That was certainly true. Although, she'd never been particularly adventurous in the bedroom. Once Alex had left, she'd been careful to keep things pleasurable, but light. She knew from her time with him that it was very possible to get creative, and some of her lovers had tried, but Grace hadn't encouraged any kind of experimentation. That was the quickest way to get kicked out of her bed, in fact. Keep things enjoyable and rote, that had been her motto when it came to her lovers.
"Who was the best lover?" Cynthia asked. The question made Irene shriek with horror, Eleanor whack the curious brunette with her fan, and Grace burst into laughter. Trust the unmanageable hoyden to be the one to break the tension. She wished she could keep Cynthia with her all the time. Eleanor might be her best friend, but she didn't have Cynthia's irreverence, which had proven remarkably effective at jostling Grace out of her misery whenever it came crashing down.
"You can't ask her that!" Irene was so appalled she was actually trembling, her voice a high-pitched squeak. It made Grace want to cover her ears, the way Eleanor had done a few minutes ago.
"But I want to know!" Cynthia protested. "She's the only one who can tell me if I'm going to get bored with one man or not, isn't she?"
"Well I can tell you I'm not bored," Irene snapped.
"You don't have a point of comparison."
"I don't need one!"
"Children, children, calm down," Grace interjected, since Eleanor was laughing too hard to. She gave them both a slightly strained smile. Although Cynthia's question had made her laugh and loosened the tension in the room, answering it kept her spirits dampened. "Alex was always the best."
Silence descended and she avidly wished that her life wasn't so complicated. Just like her to bring down the happiness of everyone else right before a wedding.
"Why?"
Irene groaned. Eleanor laughed. Cynthia looked at both of them in exasperation. "What? What did I do now? The why is important, don't you think?"
"It's the most important thing," Grace said. Perhaps her own relationship with Alex had fallen apart, but since they were all handing out marriage advice to Cynthia, she was going to give the young woman the best words of wisdom she had. Maybe Cynthia would be able to make a better go of it. Certainly, Wesley was head over heels in love with the young chit, and she was fairly certain that Cynthia loved him back. It wouldn't do for her to accidentally ruin their relationship because of her natural curiosity, and Grace hoped her words would help Cynthia to realize that. "It was always the best with Alex because, for me, it wasn't just about the physical. I loved him and it made everything we did together transcend regular pleasure. With my lovers.... it was enjoyable. I found my pleasure. But it wasn't the same. There's nothing more incredible than making love with someone you love."
This time the silence in the room was different. Reverent. Irene and Eleanor were glowing, but also looking at her with a kind of sympathetic sadness. She refused to think of it as pity. Cynthia looked thoughtful.
"So, why are you fighting becoming reconciled with him?"
Maybe it was Cynthia's guilelessness. Maybe it was the sherry. Maybe it was because she was finally starting to seriously consider that Alex might be genuine in his desire to reconcile.
The whole story came spilling from her lips. They all listened, Eleanor with the sympathy of a friend who had already heard everything, holding Grace's hand and giving it the occasional supportive squeeze. Across from them, Irene listened with pursed lips, as though she was keeping in some of her thoughts, allowing Grace to fully have her say. Which made Grace wonder what insights Irene might have into Alex's behavior. It still hurt her, a bit, how close Alex and Irene had been, how much more Irene had known him, but it was a distant kind of hurt. Irene no longer flaunted their relationship the way she had back then, and she'd apologized for her previous actions.
Cynthia was listening very carefully, chewing on her lower lip. She brightened when Grace got to the part about wanting to search through Alex's papers, to see if she could find a hint or even some evidence about any business transactions that might be spurring his decision. Of course, Eleanor groaned in disgust at Grace’s plan, since she hadn't heard it before.
"That's a terrible idea," Eleanor said, shaking her head. "What if nothing's there? Then will you believe him?"
"It would help," Grace argued. "I know it's not definitive, but if there's nothing condemning there, then at least I know."
"I think it's brilliant," Cynthia gushed, leaning forward in her seat, her hazel eyes sparkling with mischief. "In fact, I think we should do it tonight."
"We?"
"Tonight?"
