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I haven’t seen or heard from him except for that night a year ago. Kat begged me and several other girls from work to celebrate her recent break-up. She was newly single and looking to hook up. Whatever. She was crazy.
I hadn’t been working at the bar as a waitress for long, maybe six months. When Kat suggested a girl’s night out and a few drinks, I jumped at the chance to experience a normal night of fun like other college students my age.
I didn’t know where we were going and didn’t pay attention until I saw the bright neon sign for Crazy Eights and the Harley’s lined up in front of the bar.
Panic filled my chest and I tried to suggest somewhere else but everyone was happy to stop there first. As we entered the familiar hub of excitement filled my veins along with the smell of licorice and fried food, the haze of cigarette smoke, and the consistent thrum of heavy guitars coming from the jukebox.
The place was packed without any open pool tables, so we decided to head toward the bar. That’s when I noticed the fight breaking out and the distinctive emblems of both the RRMC and Satan’s Outlaws MC on their leather jackets. The brawl quickly turned dangerous.
Everything happened so fast.
My eyes met Peter’s and widened in shock moments before I recognized Bryce. He ran for me but never made it close enough before Pete tackled him to the ground. I screamed when another SOMC member grabbed me and held a knife to my neck, threatening to kill me in front of Pete.
I froze, memories of four years ago and losing my family assaulting my senses.
The terror never fully left me.
I blinked, and in that instant Peter changed. A feral snarl ripped from his lips as he ran through the fighting bodies and managed to reach us in record time. I screamed, terrified, as I watched Peter yank the biker from me and throw him to the ground, beating the hell out of the guy, blood gushing from his nose and mouth. Pete didn’t stop even when the man was unconscious.
R.J. and Jake pulled him off the Outlaws member as Peter’s growl launched from his throat. He stepped toward me when the front doors of the bar burst wide open and police flooded the area. All of the MC members were arrested along with half the bar. It was total chaos.
I lost Peter until he was being shoved into a patrol car.
Flashing red and blue lights stood out in the misty cool night as a steady drizzling rain fell from the angry sky. One of the officers gave me a blanket and tried to convince me to see a doctor and leave in one of the ambulances. I refused.
As our eyes met, Pete whispered my name and I looked away, scared and overwhelmed with the disastrous night. I wished I had never set foot back in Providence.
When I finally was able to look back, the patrol car was gone.
Sighing, I asked Kat to take me home. Everyone was quiet as we drove back to Juniper Hills.
She’s never asked me to go out since. Fine by me.
Sipping my tea, I closed my eyes and sighed. I never told Paul I was there that night.
He never mentioned it, but I saw the tightness of his jaw and the anger in his eyes the next morning when we met for our weekly Sunday follow up. We argued over something small and insignificant that day but what I remember was his declaration of feelings and the gentle kiss he placed on my forehead, promising he would keep me safe.
Since then it’s been different with him and I never quite know where I stand.
Sort of with everything else in my life.
I felt abandoned and alone, lonely and heartbroken, sad and anxious, even in a crowded room. No matter what I did or who I was with, that feeling never went away. Not in five long, painful years.
I don’t think it ever will.
Chapter 32
The cell doors to my personal hell opened for the last time as I stepped past the cool gray metal bars. I walked the
halls with a guard, a smug smile on my face as I passed all the unlucky motherfuckers still doing time. I lost a year of my life in this shithole, bored and fucking ready to lose my goddamn mind. Stupid fucking bar fight. Goddamn Outlaws.
I had plenty of anger and little remorse for that night.
The only part I regretted was the moment I didn’t whisper the three words that were buried in my heart to Rae. That moment when our eyes met in the drizzling rain, the flashing blue and red lights illuminating her fair skin, was the second I knew she was mine forever and I didn’t say it.
I didn’t tell her. I fucking should have yelled what my heart wanted her to hear.
I love you.
