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“I bet it’s difficult being there again after all this time,” Holly said. “All those memories.”
“Would have been a lot harder if my father was still alive.” His attempt at humor fell flatter than a burned pancake. “There’s no need to tiptoe around the truth, Holly. It’s not as if those years are a secret to anyone who’s lived here. I don’t spend many hours there. And it’s not as though I’ll be here forever. When my term’s over, I’ll either sell the house as is, or raze the entire property line. Let someone come in and start over.” If he’d been superstitious he might have the land exorcized or smudged with burning sage. At least his father had saved everyone the hassle and made arrangements to be cremated.
“You’re not staying, then?”
He had to be imagining the disappointment he heard in her voice. “I came back as a favor to your father, Holly. I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”
“Yeah, sure.” She tucked her hair behind her ear. “I was thinking with everything you want to do, it might take a little longer than you expect.”
Yeah, he’d been imagining it. The last person who would want him to stick around Butterfly Harbor was Holly Campbell. A friendly short-term truce would have to be enough.
“I finish what I start, Holly.” But he could understand her concern. “And I keep my promises. I won’t leave until I’m sure everything’s in place.”
“Nice to know.” She clasped her hands behind her as they continued down Monarch Lane. “That you keep your promises. In case I didn’t say so before, thank you for asking my father to take charge of the youth-center project. I can’t tell you how relieved I am he’ll have something productive to do with his time.”
“I get the feeling Jake underestimated just how big a difference not being sheriff was going to be.” This wasn’t a job one could simply walk away from. Even in a small town, there were plenty of things to keep him and his two deputies jumping. From reports of lost cats to garden sheds being broken in to, to missing stop signs and reports of vagrants in abandoned houses. And don’t get him started on the parking tickets and traffic infractions.
“What did he mean last night?” Holly’s question broke into Luke’s reverie. “When he said the accident was as much his fault as yours?”
Luke stepped around her so he could look out at the cresting shoreline. Would he ever get tired of the sound of waves or the smell of midmorning salt air? “No idea.”
“Don’t lie to me, Luke.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him to a stop, pinning him with a look Luke was convinced Simon had been on the receiving end of on more than one occasion. “I can deal with a lot of things, but not being lied to.” The ferocity in her voice, the flash of hurt and anger mingling in her eyes, reminded him that not all had been perfect between her and Gray. “What don’t I know?”
As many doors to the past as had been opened recently, this wasn’t one he wanted to walk through. Not with things going as well as they were between them. “It’s nothing that makes any difference, Holly.” He started to cover her hand with his, but before he made contact, he closed his fist, dropped his arm. As much as he wanted to touch her, to have some physical contact, there wasn’t anywhere for his growing feelings for her to go. “The accident was what it was. It’s over.”
“So there is something.” Her fingers squeezed; a silent plea for him to continue. “Luke, I’ve spent a lot of years blaming you and only you. If I’m wrong about—”
“That’s the thing, Holly.” Luke couldn’t help but stare into her eyes, the swirling depths catching hold of him and threatening to drag him down. “You’re not wrong. I got into that car after I’d been drinking. I knew I shouldn’t, but I did it anyway. And your father ended up paying the price. Nothing else matters.”
He tried to tug his arm free, but she hung on and moved in front of him, that defiant, determined look on her face.
“Where were you going?”
“I’m following your son.”
“Not funny.” Holly shook her head. “The more you evade my questions, the more I’m certain there’s something you and my father are keeping from me. Where were you driving to that night?”
“Why do you care?” He hated the desperation he heard in his own voice—whiny, complaining. It was bad enough he couldn’t leave the past behind him. He didn’t want her to have to deal with the same. “Holly, what possible difference does all this make now?”
She snatched her hand off his arm as if she’d been burned. “Because the man I’ve come to know these past couple of weeks isn’t anything like I imagined you’d become. It makes me wonder if I misjudged you from the start,” she said.
“You didn’t.”
“Yeah, see, the more you insist, the less I believe you.” She planted her hands on her hips. “We’re having this out right now, so I’m asking you for the last time, what really happened?”
Luke caught sight of Jake’s car pulling up in front of the community center. Any hope he might have had that Simon and Charlie would prove a distraction vanished as they raced to greet Jake and help him unload what looked like a full load of paint supplies. Luke sighed. Could fighting with Holly be any more exhausting? But while telling her the actual circumstances of the night wouldn’t change anything for him, maybe it would finally give her some peace of mind. “Prom night’s always been a busy night for your dad and the deputies.”
“Yeah. I remember he was ready to go out on patrol while I was getting dressed.” Holly inclined her head, the spark of frustration he’d seen in her eyes fading as she fell into the conversation.
“You probably noticed I didn’t go. I had the house to myself, was drinking myself pretty stupid. Hoping to pass out before my old man got home.” There it was. Luke ground his teeth as the sympathy slipped over Holly’s pretty features. He took a deep breath, scrubbed a hand down his face. “I was almost there when the phone rang. It was your dad. He’d gotten a call from the bartender at the Dirty Rose complaining about my father, but he was on his way to the high school to make sure no one had been drinking before they got into their cars.”
“He still does that.” Holly’s stance shifted. She folded her arms over her chest as she watched his face for any change of expression. “Or he did.”
“Your dad asked me to go pick my father up. He didn’t want him in the drunk tank that night because there weren’t enough deputies on shift to watch out for him. He told me to drive straight there to get him so he could sleep it off at home.”
Comprehension shone in her eyes. “Dad didn’t know you’d been drinking.”
“I didn’t have the chance to tell him.” Why did he feel compelled to convince her he’d never meant any harm? He shouldn’t care what Holly thought of him, but he did. Other than Jake, he couldn’t think of anyone else on this planet he wanted to think well of him. “Looking back, I didn’t realize how impaired I was. I can’t tell you how many nights I’ve wondered if only I had realized, or if I hadn’t picked up the phone, how so many things would have been different.”
Holly ducked her chin, but not before he saw her flinch. Well, she’d wanted to know. No turning back now.
“There was a part of me that was proud your father thought he could rely on me to handle the situation. By then Dad and I occupied the same space, but we didn’t interact. Not after I gave him a dose of what he’d dished out to me all those years. So I got into my car and headed into town.”
Tears filled Holly’s brown eyes. “And crashed into my father’s patrol car on the way.”
His shoulders felt heavy, as if he was caving in on himself. “I did what I could to help him, Holly. I swear I did.”
She nodded, but didn’t move. Her eyes had gone distant, perhaps peering into the past he was describing.
“I can’t explain it, but the crash jolted me out of the stupor I was in. I called 911 before I even got out of the car and I stayed with him until the ambulance got there. I even remember...” He’d tried to pull the memories free for years. “I think I took off my shirt and tied it around his leg to try to stop the bleeding.”
“Wait, what?” Holly blinked out of her stupor, but he couldn’t meet her gaze, not as the guilt descended again with the force of two lifetimes.
Holly closed her eyes, freeing the tears to splash down her pale cheeks.
“Holly, don’t. Please.” Luke reached out to brush his fingers against her face, but stopped himself. “Simon’s not the only one who doesn’t like to see you cry. I only wish I could do more than apologize to make things right. You see, I knew there wasn’t any point of telling you. None of it matters.”
