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Settling her mom into her new room was made much easier by the amazing staff, who were obviously very used to these situations and worked to give the family space but also offered the needed support for the transition.
Whitney and Trent stayed with her mother for hours until she insisted they leave. “Gotta go see if there are any hot old guys living here,” she said with a wink. “There’s nothing better than a first date, and given the circumstances, I suspect I’ll have a lot of them.”
Her mother’s humor was helping her get through this difficult time, and the three of them hugged for a long time before she pushed them out the room door. “Go live your life,” she whispered to Whitney. “I’m going to be just fine here.”
Trent was a sobbing mess as they signed the papers at the front desk.
But when he pulled out his credit card to leave on file for the monthly payments, Whitney frowned, stopping him. “No. This is my expense.”
“Ourexpense,” he said.
She shook her head. “No, Trent.”
“Whitney, we’re in this together.”
“I can’t accept help with this.”
“It’s not accepting help. I love you. We’re in a relationship. We’re engaged now and planning a future together. For good. For bad. I’m all in.”
But she stood firm. “Not in this.”
He looked annoyed but allowed her to set up the payments on her own credit card.
In the Jeep moments later, the air was thick and heavy, adding to the tense pressure of the sad day. “Look, I appreciate your wanting to help…”
“It’s stuff like this that makes me question your commitment to our relationship,” Trent said, staring straight ahead through the windshield as he started the vehicle.
The words felt like a slap. “You know I’m independent.”
“You’re also stubborn and proud. Those aren’t always virtues.”
Her mouth dropped. “Well, you’re sometimes overbearing and insistent on ‘your way or no way.’ Those aren’t always virtues, either.”
Hurtful words spouted, fueled by the emotionally exhausting day, and they drove in silence back home, both battling their own pain.
But entering the house, Trent turned to her, an apology in his expression. He didn’t need to say anything and she didn’t, either. He opened his arms, and she walked into them. He held her tight while she finally let the tears fall.
…
Now…
This time, he wasn’t there to hold her as she cried.
…
The springs of the tiny cot Trent had rolled into his office at the bar dug into his back as he lay staring up at the ceiling for long hours into the night. He was no stranger to nights like this. Countless nights couch surfing, sleeping on friends’ floors over the years in the city when he was competing, hadn’t made him dependent on comfort for a sense of security or happiness. So it wasn’t the fact that he was lying there on a too-small, uncomfortable cot that made it impossible to sleep. It wasn’t the eerie silence, either. And it wasn’t the thought of being alone.
Before Whitney, he’d never met anyone he’d fallen so hard for. He’d been okay with the prospect of being a bachelor. Then everything had changed for him. She was everything he’d never known he was searching for. She was the one person he’d needed more than air. The only person he didn’t know how to live without.
How could he move forward without her, knowing life would always suck just that much more? That real happiness had existed with her, in her. That he’d never again be filled with the love he’d had with her.
But she didn’t want to be with him anymore. He’d thought her pushing him away for the past year had been because of the stressful job and the pressure she was under. He’d believed she was putting off wedding plans and talks of forever because she’d been too busy to make space and time for it.
But that hadn’t been the case at all.
Whitney had simply stopped loving him. Stopped wanting all the things she’d once told him she wanted. She’d been looking for a way out and a way to tell him she’d had a change of heart. He couldn’t wrap his mind around it. He didn’t want to believe it.
He knew they were struggling lately, but there were still moments throughout the past year when their connection was just as strong—maybe even stronger—than it always was. Remembering those brief glimpses into the love they had for each other made it that much harder to accept this.
