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“Are you ok?”
My heart was thrumming, legs so weak. I flopped myself down onto the toilet seat. Was I ok? It took me a few moments to work it out, but when I did there was only one answer.
I smiled, giggly and euphoric.
“Fucking hell, Jason, that was really amazing.”
***
I would’ve exploded if I hadn’t booked a last minute slot down at Dirty Angels. I made it deliberately late, wrapping up at the same time as one of Cara’s open ballet sessions. I don’t think it took a mind reader to work out why I was there, and Cara dutifully dragged me on down to the Devonshire Arms as though it was her idea.
Raven was off with the green-eyed girl, planning some custom wedding invites apparently, so it was just me and my chocolate-eyed confidant. She listened, and she giggled, and she let me gush to my heart’s content, the makings of a true friend.
And then she invited me to Explicit again.
“Bring him!” she insisted. “You must bring him! You’d have so much fun, and you could still do the blindfold thing. Hell, there are loads of cool people there, you’d never run out of combinations to fuck.”
“I’ll try,” I promised. “He didn’t seem so keen last time I suggested it.”
“Work on it,” she said. “You’ll love it there.”
I caught her staring at me over her snakebite and black, a curious expression on her face. “What?” I asked. “What is it?”
“Don’t you want to know what he looks like?”
The thought flushed my face. “Sometimes. I dunno. It’s my fantasy, the stranger who’ll fuck me like I need to be fucked. Seeing his face might kill it. Make it too real, you know? Before you know it we’d be chilling out for TV nights, and then we’d be doing the shopping together. Maybe he’d even give me a ride in his truck, let me toot the horn.”
“And that’s bad?”
“Yeah, that’s bad. That’s not what I want. I don’t want to drift into a normal crappy life with someone who makes me feel so alive.”
“And if it didn’t drift? If it was something good?”
How I wished. I really wished. “He’s married, technically. And who knows? He might like watching soaps and eating couscous. He might like sleeping with his socks on in bed, and organising food in colour order in the fridge.”
She laughed. “Ok, Figi, if you say so. I give you a month before you’ve fallen for him, and then see how much of a deal breaker couscous and socks in bed are.”
The flutter in my stomach told me she was wrong.
It wouldn’t be a month. It was already happening.
***
Jason knew my schedule and it showed. He called the minute I signed off from my shift.
“Are you sure you’re ok, dirty girl? Maybe I should have been there.”
“I’m good,” I said, and I meant it. “It was crazy.”
“Crazy good or crazy fucked up?”
“Both.”
He was silent for a long moment.“How is your week, Gemma?”
“It’s filled with a dirty bad stranger. I can’t seem to keep my mind off him.”
“Good. I like that.”
