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She took a deep breath and held it. Her gaze locked on him, and she couldn’t have looked away for anything.
“But you haven’t even spoken to me in days, Matt. You didn’t even call me back after I called you.”
“I know.” He shook his head again. “You’ve got a right to be pissed, but hear me out first, at least.”
Last time, they hadn’t talked. This time, Kayla told herself, she wanted to hear everything he had to say.
“Coming back to Cheyenne,” he said, “I knew I wanted to reconnect with you. I even had a plan.”
“What sort of plan?” Kayla watched him and saw emotions dart across the surface of his eyes in a rush too quick for her to identify any of them.
“Doesn’t matter now. Oh, I thought it was brilliant. I’m good at plans,” he muttered thickly, once again pacing the confines of the small living room. “Ask anyone. I know how to land a big account for Lassiter Media. I know how to build a career and make millions. I know how to buy a damn art gallery secretly.”
“You bought an art gallery?”
He snorted and shot her a quick look. “Yeah. It was supposed to be a surprise for you. Once my plan was finished.”
That unsteady feeling she’d been experiencing only got worse as the whole world seemed to shift and slide beneath her feet.
“It was a surprise but it’s not now?” Confused, she kept watching him and couldn’t help thinking that this was the first time since she’d known him that Matt seemed...unsure of himself.
“Well, since I just told you about it, it’s not a surprise,” he grumbled. “But more than that, the plan’s not going to be finished because I’m done with the plan.”
“Why don’t you tell me what the ‘plan’ was.”
“Simple. I was going to take it slow with you. No fast moves. Earn your trust. Make you believe in me—us—again.” He snorted. “But hell...”
“So,” she said around a knot that settled in her throat. It seemed this was just going to get worse and she wouldn’t have thought that possible. Her heartbeat slowed and dread gathered in her chest. “You don’t want me anymore.”
His gaze snapped to hers. “Are you crazy? You’re all I want, Kayla. The rest of the world could drop into the ocean and I wouldn’t care as long as I had you.”
Dread dissolved and hope rose up, fluttering wildly in the pit of her stomach. She took a breath and held it, afraid to listen. Afraid to not listen.
“No, it’s the plan I’m done with,” he said tightly. “Like I said, I was going to take my time. Prove to you that you could trust me. No rush. No hurry. I thought that was the best way. See, I know I love you—”
She reached out and grabbed hold of the back of a chair, just to keep herself steady. There it was. The three words she most wanted to hear. But he hadn’t even noticed the effect they’d had on her because he was still talking. She hadn’t expected this. Hadn’t thought to hope for it. A smile hovered at the corners of her mouth, but she forced herself to listen.
“I knew you’d need time to believe me. Hell,” he snorted, “I pretty much guaranteed that by leaving without even talking to you nine months ago. There’s no way you would just take my word for it if I told you what I felt for you. Why should you?”
“Matt...” She tried to interrupt, to tell him that she loved him, too. That she didn’t want to waste another moment with doubt, mistrust. She wanted to grab hold of life—and him—and never let go. She wanted to say so much, but he was on a roll and kept right on talking.
“I wanted you to be sure. To love me back. To know that I’d never leave you again.” Shaking his head in disgust, he stopped at the coffee pot, poured them both a cup, then didn’t bother to drink his.
“So what changed?” she asked. “Why are you done with the big plan?”
He snapped her another fierce look. “J.D. died. He wasn’t expecting it. Hadn’t made a plan for it. He was just standing there toasting his daughter and boom. Gone.”
“I know, Matt, but—”
