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“He’s dead,” Dante says, trying to reason.
I don’t relent, I can’t. He needs more pain. My frenzied punches keep landing at a vicious unrelenting pace.
“C’mon.” Dante pulls harder, but I resist not slowing my strikes. “Lilly needs you!”
Lilly?
I stop.
My mind comes back from the darkest places inside me, and all I need to do is see her. Hold her. Make sure she is safe.
I look down at the dead pile of flesh, an unrecognizable face covered in blood. My entire body is still coursing with fury, but I stand and wipe my hands down the front of my shirt.
“Feed him to the sharks,” I say to Dave and turn, walking away and leaving behind the last of Lilly’s past determined to make right every wrong she’s ever had to endure.
And I will, if it takes the rest of my life to do.
37
Lilly
Panicgripsmefirst,just before my eyes open and I gasp and jerk, unsure of what’s to come, but a sharp pain stops all movement, all thoughts.
“Baby, it’s okay,” a sweet soft, deep voice says.
Ren’s voice.
And then his face appears in front of me.
“You’re home. You’re safe.” His voice cracks, his eyes soften, and his fingers gently caress my cheek.
A dream. I’m still dreaming, but his warm hand feel so real against my face, his touch so soft I believe the words.
“He’s never going to hurt you again.” His tender lips find my forehead, so gentle and loving I hope I never wake.
But what if I am awake?
What if my mind is playing games, and the man in front of me is him and not Ren, but the monster from my nightmares. I close my eyes blinking hard, shaking the delusion away. It’s dangerous to play fantasy now, I need my brain to focus so I can survive. When I open them again, he’s still there, still staring at me with his loving teary eyes.
“Ren?” My voice croaks.
He nods, stroking and touching my hair. “I’m here baby.”
My eyes roam over his face, not believing that he is here with me. I look past him, and see our bedroom, the love seat, his dresser.
Is it real?
Please let it be real.
“You found me?” Tears fall and I feel those too, wet and warm, sliding down my face.
He nods, and a tear slips out. “I was so scared.”
I shift in the soft bed, and a dull pain stabs at my back. You can’t feel pain in a dream, can you?
“He wasn’t at any of the places we talked about.” Ren’s eyes hold so much love and despair. “When I saw Amari…”
He doesn’t finish, but grimaces at the memory. Then moves onto the bed and shifts so he is partially cradling me. Careful to avoid the lashes on my back.
