AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“You said the house was old.” She gives me a ghost of a smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes.
I lean forward and reach out my hand for her to come to me. She only shakes her head and stays where she is like her feet are glued to the floor.
“Whenever you’re ready. There’s nowhere else I want to be.” I lean back, smiling at her, which is hard with all this shit going on in my head.
“I’m thinking getting into bed with you is a very bad idea. We should have a three feet rule like in netball.”
I laugh, but it’s good to know she can’t resist my touch, any more than I can hers. But I couldn’t think of anything more torturous than that.
“We can build a pillow wall if it makes you feel better,” I say.
“I’m thinking bricks.”
I lift the pillows looking around. “No bricks here. Sorry, sweetheart.”
That brings her smile back to her face, despite that, she still doesn’t move.
“So…” She swallows, and her eyes drop to my hands. “What’s with the box?”
I look down, my nerves hitting a new level of high.
“I wasn’t sure when to give it to you, but since you told everyone last night, I was your fiancé.” I shrug. “Seemed like the right time.”
“I told everyone?” Her voice is incredulous, but her face changes, and a realisation washes over her. “Oh, I get it. Right before family dinner.”
I frown, that’s not what I meant at all.
“You don’t have to…” Then I pause, because that’s not exactly true. “I mean…”
Fuck.
What am I doing?
The confusion on her face says it all. To her, this is forced and unwanted. Of course, she thinks this ring is because I’m making her marry me. Sickness swells inside and my heart shatters, but when it does, anger takes hold.
“Wasn’t that tonight?” Her brows furrow generally confused. “Isn’t that why you have the ring now?”
Just shoot me in the fucking heart why don’t you?
I shake my head, opening the drawer by my bed and put the ring and my pride that’s been shattered away.
“Family dinner is tonight.” This time, my voice is emotionless, it’s the only way to not combust. “If it was just for show, I wouldn’t be giving you my mother’s ring.”
My jaw is tight, the anger is swelling, and I see her face crumble in front of me.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” Her soft voice just makes me angrier.
How the fuck can’t she know how I feel? Or what this is? This isn’t a fucking game anymore. And if I thought my anger was struggling to be contained before, her next words take it to the next level.
“It’s probably for the best, anyway,” she says sounding resigned, defeated and almost tipping me over the edge. “I’m going to take a shower.”
She looks down to the floor as she walks right out of my room. I don’t say a fucking word because nothing good can come from the way I feel right now, but that is the last time she walks away. This is the last time I let her. Today this ends, once and for all, one way or another. She needs to make her choice, because I am all fucking in.
26
Lilly
Ican’tdothisanymore. Today ripped out my heart. Walking away from him, hurting him, it’s killing me, even though I can’t let myself have it again. I will savour last night forever.
