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My heart raced as his hands swept up my spine and then into my hair as he deepened our kiss. An electric current ran through my veins as I clung to him, not wanting the moment to end.
His deep green eyes were full of heat as he gripped my arms and pulled away, just enough to say, "You can shut me up, but you can't change how I feel."
The next second, his mouth covered mine, swallowing any protest.
I didn't want to hear about how he felt when I needed to leave. But everything in my body ached for him. There was a strange restless feeling in my arms and legs and I throbbed like I was going to die if I didn't have him inside me.
I still fisted his shirt, and I tugged his mouth down to mine again. He came easily. His lips brushed against mine in a soft, tentative kiss. When I tried to deepen the kiss, pressing myself against him urgently, his hand cupped my jaw and he slowed me down.
His hands were firm yet gentle, as his fingers tangled in my hair. He leaned in and kissed me again, soft and slow and sweet. The heat of his mouth against mine sent my pulse racing.
My skin tingled as his hands explored my body. His fingers caressed my curves, tracing circles around my hips, my breasts, my stomach, and every touch increased my sense of wanton need.
I gasped as he kissed me again, more deeply this time, his tongue exploring my mouth with a hunger and longing that threatened to overwhelm me. I clung to him, kissing him wildly.
I only broke away from him long enough to murmur, "I need you."
His hand delved between my thighs, and even through the nightgown I wore, his touch made my back arch, my hips rocking against him. His gaze when he looked down at me was intense, his pupils dilated as if he were drugged. He rubbed through my dress as desperately as I rocked against him, and his cock was hard against my thigh.
He pulled me close and murmured into my ear, "I can smell your slick and it's driving me wild."
Then he turned his head and kissed my neck, finding the places that sent an electric thrill through my body. I let out a moan before I crushed my lip between my teeth, trying to stifle it. I had to be quiet. We were barely alone, here at the back of the house with the curtains drawn between us and the bedroom. I didn't want anyone to overhear.
"Shaw," I whispered hungrily, reaching for his belt, unbuckling it urgently. It was only when I'd pushed his trousers open that I realized I didn’t feel the usual impulse of fear over a man's belt.
But it was Shaw. Shaw, who was safe, who had held me during my cramps and kissed the top of my head and held me tenderly.
I drew him out and gripped him tightly. He let out a groan as he looked down at me, and his face was filled with barely-mastered control. He looked as if he were about to lose his mind.
"Amelia," he managed, "do you think you could be in heat?"
My lips parted as I stared up at him, trying to make sense of the words when I was a ball of want and need.
"I can't be." The heat started sometime after a woman began to shift, and only after she'd found her mate. I'd pretended to be in heat for Nathan, but only because he needed me to pretend to be wild for him for the sake of his ego. "I never..."
He shook his head as if he were trying to sober up, as if he couldn't quite shake himself back to sense. "If it's your first time, then it won't be as bad... yet... but it could start to be worse."
I gripped his hand and guided it back to my aching need. "It had better not ever be worse," I murmured, because the desperate need I felt for him now felt uncontrolled.
And I always had to be in control of myself. It was the only way I could survive in a world where men controlled everything else.
And yet...
"We'll figure it out," I said urgently. "But I need you now."
He hesitated.
"Shaw..." I whispered, my voice a plea.
The sound seemed to break him. He ran his hands up my thighs, under my skirt, and his fingers hooked into my panties. I swayed against him urgently as he all but ripped them away.
His fingers were rough now as they moved over my body and between my thighs, exploring every inch of my skin with an intensity that made me gasp in pleasure and anticipation.
Every touch seemed to rip through me like lightning and I couldn't help but cry out as he caressed my curves and kissed the sensitive spots at the base of neck and shoulder where his lips found purchase against my heated skin. He nipped beneath my ear, my throat, and the grazing of his teeth over my skin made me want to scream with desire.
He caught my chin and pulled my face up to meet his, then kissed me fiercely again. My head was reeling as he suddenly spun me around and bent me over the balcony railing. But even though my mind couldn't quite keep up, my body screamed that this was what it wanted. Every part of my body was wild for him.
The cold metal sent a shock wave through my body that made me gasp and arch even higher against it. He grasped my hips firmly in his hands as he moved behind me, then carefully slid inside of me with one long thrust.
