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“I just wanted to tell you that you’re an asshole in person.” Those weren’t in the words I had planned to say to him, but they come out anyway. Am I determined to run any chance of reconciliation into the ground? Gosh, why did I start my declaration by insulting him? I pause as I think of how to continue.
“Okay.” Will looks a little puzzled, but he still looks hopeful.
“And despite that, I can’t stop thinking about you.” I add. Yeah, that is better, very eloquent.
“And you said I’m bad with words.” Will chuckles and the hope in his eyes is growing.
“You are also super annoying. Half the stuff you say makes me want to hit you, but the other half makes me an emotional wreck. When you smile, it makes me feel like I’ve done something wonderful, which is ridiculous. I hate that you can sum me up with just one word and I hate that it is accurate. I’m predictably in love with you, and it is typical.” I blurt out the words in a rush, barely pausing to catch a breath, but I just need to get them out before I can further ruin my chances with him.
“Maybe I’m typical too, because I am in love with you, Hannah.” Will gives me one of his rare genuinely happy smiles, it shines through his eyes and just as I said I feel as if I have done something amazing in making him smile, but even more than his smile his words fill me with a happiness that has been absent from my life since Mama died. It is the type of happiness that escapes words but fills my chest so fully that I imagine it might shine outward.
“You love me?” I ask, mostly because I want to hear him say it again, so I can really absorb it. I smile up at him and tears fill my eyes at how surreal this moment is.
“Yes, Hannah, I love you. Now stop crying or I might join you.” I notice the glassy look in his eyes, which makes my smile grow even bigger as I wrap my arms around his neck in a hug.
“I missed you, CB.” I don’t think I have ever missed anyone the way I have missed Will, and having him here in my arms is like having my heart returned. I feel whole for the first time in weeks.
“I missed you too, STG. So. Damn. Much.” Will emphasizes his words with a squeeze.
“What now?” I ask a little while later as we walk down the street hand in hand.
“I thought that was obvious. I’m going to date you super hard, con you into marrying me, and we will live happily ever after in a suburb.” Will pulls me to his side with a hand around my waist and presses a kiss to my temple.
“I thought you didn’t believe in happily ever after.” I look up into his eyes, happy to see the gleam of happiness that lights his expression.
“Someone changed my mind.” Will shoots me a wink and I blush as I realize that after all these months I still have butterflies.
Epilogue
It is odd to walk through the airport hand in hand with Will. I’m not sure if it is because the last time I stood in this place, he broke my heart or because even though I wanted this, it never seemed to be within reach. Either way, as we make our way through the airport and out into the pickup area, I feel the change taking root. This is a new beginning. A new city, a new school, the same Will and me, but with a new understanding.
Will decides a cab is our best option because of my packing “all of Willow Springs and the swamp” into my four large suitcases, but I will not be ashamed for trying to bring a little or maybe a lot of home to the big city. I will be here for a couple of years, so I might as well get comfortable. Maybe I won’t be as homesick if I have the quilt Mama made me, my favorite mug, and several boxes of the sweet tea mix I know I won’t be able to find in NYC.
Will flags down a cab and loads my suitcases into the trunk, grunting as if they are obnoxiously heavy, but I’ve seen how much he works out, so I just roll my eyes as I slip into the backseat. I give the cabbie my new apartment’s address and when Will slides in beside me, and we begin the slow crawl to Manhattan.
“I’m still not sure why you had to shack up with the vogue cowboy doctor.” Will complains for about the twentieth time since he found out Flynn was going to be my roommate.
“It could be worse. I could be roommates with a moody writer. I have a thing for them, you know.” At this point, I’m not sure how Will thinks he has any competition. When I’m not insulting him, which is a love language of its own, I basically obsess over him. The way his glasses slide down his nose as he is reading, adorable. How he taps his thigh when he is nervous, completely enchanting. The sleepy smile he gives me when he is tired, but doesn’t want to say goodnight, bewitching.
“That’s not such a bad idea. You can be my roommate.” Will proposes with a goofy smile, and I can’t help but laugh. The two of us living together would not go well, at least not yet.
“Please, you would kick me and all my non-neutral décor out within a week.” I point out. Will’s apartment is all black and white and gray and boring, or as he calls it, “modern”. My stuff is all red gingham and what he lovingly calls ‘backwater decor’.
“I’d be willing to compromise on a lot to have you with me every night.” Will says softly, and I’m surprised to find him sincere. It makes my heart stutter a bit. Will Whitmore being in love with me is a fact that is hard for me to believe. Seems more like a fever dream than reality, but it is real and frustrating and better than I could have imagined.
“More like you will do a lot to keep me away from Flynn.” His jealousy makes me chuckle. It is endearing, but honestly ridiculous.
“That might be my primary motivator, but the personal chef and attractive eye candy also play a part in my offer. Sometimes, I even like the things you say.” Will smiles sweetly, as if he had just paid me a high compliment and I shove him away playfully.
“Wow, high praise. You know you have nothing to worry about, right? I love you William Owen Whitmore.” I reassure, but his smirk is cocky by the time I finish I decide to rib him a little. “No charming, courteous, vogue cowboy doctor could ever compete with my asshole boyfriend.”
“At least you see me clearly.” Will chuckles as he pulls me back to his side.
The cab stops in front of my apartment building and suddenly everything feels so much more real. I’ve moved to New York City. Deep breath. I’m starting at Columbia in two days. Deep breath. Will is my boyfriend. Big smile. I’m living my own life. Deep breath.
Will grabs my bags from the trunk and meets me where I stand useless on the sidewalk just taking in the city. He wraps an arm around my shoulder and all the big changes in my life seem more manageable.
“Are you ready for this, STG?” Will asks, turning me towards the entrance to my building, where a new beginning awaits, but with Will by my side, it doesn’t seem as daunting.
“Yeah, I think I am.”
