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Diana
I used my phone and checked Rafe’s location. He was almost home. The real question was whether or not I could go through with it. I glanced down at the pill in my hand. What the hell was wrong with me? I’d come this far. This pill, it wasn’t supposed to hurt him… much. It was like sodium pentothal. I ignored the fact that most governments considered its use torture. And this… I’d been told that these pills might have side effects similar to MDMA. Could I use it on him?
It would just get me the truth. Get me what I needed, and then I could go before I sank in even deeper with him.
You’re an idiot for letting him get so close.
Shit. Iwasan idiot. I didn’t have to be told twice. With every touch of his, or glance, or caress, my armor slipped.
Without even trying, he’d found the chinks. The man he pretended to be had slid in under my skin, making a home there, infesting my brain, making it impossible to think straight.
You sure your brain is what he infested?
He had killed my father. I could never forgive that even if this new version of him seemed like a good man. I couldn’t risk believing it.
He’s a killer. Remember that.
I stared down at the pill. Maybe Charisse was right. Maybe I’d sunk too deep. Maybe I was in way over my head.
Stop it. Because of him, your father is no longer here.
My phone alerted me that Rafe was essentially outside the door. I glanced at the little white pill again. Could I do it? Could I hurt him?
My hands shook. I knew the answer before I even asked it. I couldn’t.Because you’re an idiot, and you’re falling for him.
Even though I knew everything he showed me was a lie, my hands still trembled as I held the little pill.
Despite all the things I said to myself, I knew it was true. I was screwed. I’d gone ahead and fallen in love with the mark. I put the pill back in the bottle and placed the cap on it before tossing it back into my purse.
If I couldn’t see this through, my only option was to leave him. And that thought hurt more than anything.
When he walked in the door, I instantly knew something was wrong.
“Hey,” I said warily, then poured him a glass of wine.
He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. That was the smile he gave people so they wouldn’t look too closely. Maybe someone who’d never seen his real one wouldn’t know the difference, but it hit me like a ton of bricks. He was hiding something from me. My other clue something was horribly wrong was the way he took the glass from me and drained it.
I took the glass and set it on the coffee table. “Is everything okay? How was work?”
Rafe hung his coat in the front closet before sitting on the couch. He let out a little sigh when he sat that told me he was tired. That really confirmed my suspicion. The man had unbelievable stamina. I blushed, thinking of how many ways he’d proven that to me. It would take more than just a stressful day to make Rafe tired. Then he turned his head, and I saw the scratch on the side of his neck. My eyes narrowed as I scanned him from head to toe.
I took one of his hands and gasped. “You got in a fight?”
Rafe sighed and stopped struggling. “Not exactly.”
Something about the way he said it made my stomach pitch. I thought about all the times he’d asked me who had hurt me over the past weeks and his insistence that he’d make it right for me, and my stomach sank.
“Rafe, what did you do?” I whispered.
He glanced over at me. “You’ll be safe now. No one’s going to hurt you.”
Oh God. I closed my eyes and swallowed the bitter tang of guilt. He’d found the poor guy I’d pretended was my ex-boyfriend, and if the state of his knuckles was any indication, he’d probably beaten the guy to a pulp.
“You shouldn’t have done that.” That was the understatement of the century. He was trying to defend my nonexistent honor and had almost taken out some poor guy who had nothing to do with anything. I felt like I was drowning under the weight of all the lies between them.
“You’re mine, and I take care of what’s mine. You make me feel things, Diana.” He dipped his mouth to mine, and as soon as our tongues met, electricity coursed through my body.
I reminded myself of the million reasons why we shouldn’t do this. At the core, he was a killer and I was a liar. He could have killed that guy today based on my lies. There was just too much wrong between us, secrets and lies and agendas. But somehow when we were together, it all fell away and none of it seemed like it mattered.
