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“Fine, I’ll show you proof of my word, and I see no reason to sugarcoat the truth from you or anyone. My silence is not the same as lying to you.”
“Then don’t sugar coat it. When my father first took sick, he did nothing but brush it off like it was nothing, a headache, a stomachache, a minor pain, all he has to do is lie down and rest and he’ll be as good as new. He pushed himself to keep diving even when the spores infested his lungs because he didn’t want to worry me, or maybe he didn’t think I could do it on my own. It wasn’t until he had collapsed that I could get the truth: he was dying. He planned to just die on me without telling me anything or giving me a chance to help him recover. Silence may not be the same as lying, but it still means you don’t trust the other person, and you’re choosing to place all the burden on yourself.”
He seemed calmer than before and that relieved me, but I still didn’t know what he was thinking.
“The diving job is for the rune I had spent centuries searching for. With it I can return home.”
“Rune? The one you said you got from the deal you made with Jaxon’s friends?”
“No, that was a fake.” He sighed. “Some of my kind don’t want a portal opened. They want to remain here because it’s the only place they know they will have any power in. One of them is a powerful man named Felman. He must have found out I or apparently others searched for it and hired some dwarf expert to recreate the rune. The bastard created several perfect replicasand scattered them all over this world. I believe now that the original never left the station. It is in the abyss.”
My lips parted before I knew it. My dad knew what that rune was; he called it worthless and wanted to leave this place that very night! did he ever encounter these fakes? “What will happen to me when you leave?”
“Gio will take over as my heir. He will want to kill off the servants he thinks are no good and start fresh to build his own legacy. However, I intend to give my servants enough funds to support themselves, free them from the bands, and aid them in escaping. As for you, I’ve grown quite fond of you. What I want is to take you home with me, even if I must force you. I’ll keep you in my castle in the mountains and guard it with my life. But would that make you happy? Living with you unhappy for a month is enough to know that there’s no point in having you by my side if it doesn’t make you happy too.”
“Do you want me to come? Because I don’t think I can live without you too. But I can’t leave my dad behind.” I said unable to believe that these words were coming from my lips and that I had meant every word.
“We have more advanced tech than here; he can receive care at my home.” He held my hand; I could hear the desperation in his voice. “I can’t say what will happen to the two of us here or back home, but I fear that if we stay here, nothing good would come of it.” He steadied himself, his grips lessening. “It would be unfair of me not to propose the alternative. I let you go with the servants, free you of your collar, give you enough funds for yourself and your father and…”
“When can we leave? As soon as we get the rune?” I had goosebumps; I didn’t want him to finish the alternative option. I thought of asking him to runaway with me somewhere but thought of the story of the titan and his human lover. They were hunted down to the point where they opted for death by theirown hands. The only way Thorsten and I could be together is if we left this world, and not by death. This was his plan to avoid the tragedy he believed we were destined to suffer. I couldn’t say this would be easy but I was prepared to follow him anywhere.
“Yes, we go straight away.” His silver eyes danced. “I’ll do right by the Madam and inform her by letter of the portal’s location, but that is it. We leave it all behind and start anew. I’ll give you time to think about your answer.”
“There’s nothing to think about,” I replied. “You say I’m your fated one, right? If so, then let’s not make any plans. If I’m meant to go with you, then I will go; if not then I won’t, isn’t fate supposed to be that simple?”
He chuckled. “Since when has anything concerning us been simple?”
“Touché.” I laughed with him. “I don’t want to live without you, Thorsten.” It was a simple confession and an admission of my vulnerability. But I was afraid for my father’s safety. If he discovered that it could have been my father who tricked him, then what would he do? Would he be so happy to return home that he wouldn’t care? Would he hold a grudge? “If we dive for this rune and it’s either not real or it’s not there, then what would happen?”
He sighed hard. “Then I will have to find that dwarf and extract whatever information I can from his lips until he gives me something tangible to go on.”
I walked over to him, putting my arms around him and bringing him close. I didn’t know how I felt about anything that was happening. I needed to find my dad and figure out what was going on. I wish I knew just what to say or do. The only thing I knew how to do was cling to him, and he held me tighter, pressing his face in my neck and taking a deep breath.
It was in this moment that I knew we were both the same. We only had each other to rely on and it was as difficult to admit as it was in letting one another go.
CHAPTER TWENTY
THORSTEN
A Week Later…
Trust seemed to be a big deal amongst dwarven dive teams, and I wanted my mate to feel comfortable working with familiar faces. I had Gio find and contact some of Kal’s old dive partners from Vanir. Teams he might have joined, and those who knew him. I also wanted to keep this mission away from the prying eyes and ears of Jötun as much as possible. He didn’t have many friends. He must have been a very lonely person. But he packed up everything and moved here to Jötun for the sake of that blond dwarf. He must have made an impression on him. Were they lovers? That blond had a holo of Kal on his person when he was captured.
Jealousy simmered within, enough to make me laugh. I was jealous of a junkie dwarf. There was no reason to harbor any ill toward him. I had stolen his lover and toyed with him that verynight. Now he loves me as much as I love him. But something still gnawed at me.
Deep in my heart, if I faced the truth of what’s best for Kal, taking him home with me might not be the best decision.
Dreams of taking Kal home plague my nights. His naked body wrapped in the furs of my kills as we make love on my bed in my real home. I pushed whatever problems that may arise into the bowels. But that wasn’t reality. Back home, he would be nothing but a curiosity, a wonder to gawk at and deemed inferior. I would keep him inside my castle, unable to go anywhere without me, as is his fate right now. Could he be happy? Or was I condemning him to the same fate I suffer from now? Longing for the air of home and our food, our people, our world. Perhaps that’s why he didn’t wish to give me a straight answer and instead rely on fate to give us the answer.
Maybe it was all bullshit to distract me, and he planned to make his own fate by finding his former lover and reuniting with him. Bingo, as the dwarves say. That was the critter gnawing at my conscious.
Since recovering from the acid attack, Kal had slept in my arms every night. His breathing was always slow and steady against my chest. The beat of his heart now matched mine completely.
How could I think of letting him go when touching him opened up every possibility to which I was free to explore, and my worries faded with each smile of his. Even now, the sun in this dreary place seemed to find only him, highlighting his soft inky strands like a halo.
Yes, I concluded that I was very selfish. But what other choice did I have but to let him go. Could I let him go? I wanted so terribly to reach out to him and take him in my arms right this moment. To hell with whoever sees the rocking vehicle on the side of the road.
“Here.” I handed him a small tablet once our car stopped in front of the inconspicuous shop on the city's third level. It was a secret location I used for my hidden business deals. “No one uses pencils and paper,” I said, looking at the archaic note pad in his hands.
