AllFreeNovel
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Back in high school, Trevor and I ran in different circles. He played hockey and I swam. Both winter sports, which meant that even in a community as small as Wildren, there was a divide. It wasn’t hostile, but people had to choose how they spent their Friday nights. And those choices carried over into lunches and the time between the bells during the school days too.
So while we were friendly… we weren’t really friends.
But somehow, any time we ended up in the same space— paired up for badminton in gym class, dissecting a cow eye in biology, or waiting in the hall to be called in for the vision test— something just clicked.
We laughed at the same jokes and got exactly what the other was saying, whether it was debating the merits of fries over tater tots or falling into that one shockingly intimate conversation about me losing my mom and him losing his dad in grade school.
We clicked so well, it scared me. And at a time when I was still working so hard to keep my secret, there was this boy who made me feel like anyone walking by could see what I was thinking about him.
Worse, that he would.
There were times I avoided him for that alone. And then times when I got reckless and leaned into that easy connection just for a minute, just praying that no one would notice. That’s what I was doing the night of Finch’s party.
Following him out to the lake after that dare– just to make sure he was good –was reckless, but I couldn’t resist. Just like I can’t resist now.
The risk isn’t the same. It’s higher. Because every night we spend together with him telling me about the players he skates with and me sharing stories from my water polo season, every time he decides to try to teach me to cook something and then has to kick me out of the kitchen to save it… every time we fall into bed, tearing at each other’s clothes with a desperation beyond my imagination makes me see how perfect this could be… if only everything about our lives was different.
I know the hurt is coming. I know saying goodbye again is going to wreck me. But after all the years of living in fear, maybe my reserves of self-preservation are exhausted. Or maybe being able to go all in with this man and having this month without holding back is worth whatever heartbreak comes after.
* * *
Trevor
For a guy on break, I’m managing to keep damn busy… which is critical to ignoring the fact that I’m about one week from ripping my heart out and leaving it here in Wildren.
Don’t think about it.
So in addition to keeping up with my conditioning, catching up with old friends, and the odd jobs I’m knocking out at Finch’s place… I got permission to use the high school gym to work out and the rink to offer a few free hockey clinics in the afternoons. Coach tells me there’s some real talent on the team this year, and it’s cool to be able to share my knowledge and experience with kids who have the same love of the sport as me.
But what makes my damn decade is when Cam shows up with his cousin’s tiny five-year-old to the open skate for the mini-mites. She’s pink from head to toe, outfit, cheeks, even the strawberry-blond curls… and already you can see this little firecracker likes to win. She skates like a demon and makes no bones about picking the puck up off her kindergarten friend’s sticks. It’s hilarious and a little scary, but not nearly so much as watching my semi-secret boyfriend… who I’ve never seen skate for a reason… fall on his taut, perfect ass.
“What were you doing today?” I laugh, walking into Cam’s place a few hours later and finding him tossing back a couple ibuprofen.
“Probably fucking up my water polo match tomorrow night, but mostly looking for an excuse to see you.”
Damn, this guy.
“I both love and hate that answer.” I take the bottle from him and put it back in the cabinet above the toaster.
“You’re awesome with those kids,” he says, sidling up to me and hooking a finger through my belt loop. “Betsy told her mom she was going to grow up and play on your hockey team. Which is bullshit, by the way, since last week she was planning to play water polo with me.”
Slipping my arms around his waist, I kiss the underside of his jaw. “Stings, huh?”
And that answering laugh rumbling against my chest is something else. It’s the kind of addicting sound someone could get hooked on, even if he knows he shouldn’t.
“You hurt for real?” I ask, hating that he might be.
He shakes his head and gives me a wink. “Nah. I’m tough.” And when he sees my concern is real, he adds, “Seriously, it’s nothing loosening up with a swim won’t take care of.”
“Practice tonight?” I didn’t think he had one. And yeah, I’ve gotten familiar with his calendar.
“Tomorrow. But I’m thinking about hitting the lake before dinner. You mind?”
“Not even a little. In fact, I’ve got ingredients for chicken piccata in the fridge. Maybe I’ll head back and start it. Or”— I let my hands do a little shameless wandering over his ass, pressing into him in a tease I’ll absolutely be regretting until I get him naked again— “maybe I’ll meet you on our dock. Hang out a while, and we can save dinner for later?”
That groan is everything and, no surprise, we end up making out with my back to his fridge and him sucking on my tongue while we rock into each other. It’s too good, but I don’t want him swimming in the dark so I pull away, giving his hard-on a parting caress.
“See you in a few.” I start for the door.
