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Jasmine
CARI CAME BACK THATnight. I felt her fury inside me and shrunk both in and out.
I was staring at the night sky when she came. My friends had all fallen asleep, but I hadn’t been able to. I was too aware of the fact that we were vulnerable to monsters and all the dangers of the in-between realms without Cari’s protection. That had kept sleep away.
For the first time ever, I felt relieved to sense the familiar feeling her presence in my mind brought. A dark cloud in an unknown shape that was distinctly hers quickly formed in my mind. The gap she had left behind was filled.
You found it, she said accusingly. That memory was private.
And yet,I replied. You left it in me.
If I were to leave my diary in your room, she said, would that give you the right to read it?
No, I replied, the guilt in me rising at once. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what it was before I was in it. I was searching for you.
I felt her surprise at the apology. It took her a while to recuperate, but her tone was calmer when she did.
She was here all night, she said, quickly changing the subject. I took it as her accepting my apology. I couldn’t risk her discovering you.
I understand, I replied. Are you okay now?
Once again, Cari was surprised. I knew why. The little girl in the memory had been pure. The dark-eyed girl, as I knew her, was cynical and sarcastic. Witnessing that part of her made me think of her in a different light, and she could tell the difference.
You do realize that I can see your thoughts? She asked annoyedly. You're almost transparent.
I can’t help my thoughts, I replied. And now that you brought it up, seeing someone’s thoughts is even more intimate than reading their diary, is it not?
Shut up,she said, but her tone had a humorous edge to it now. Where are you?
In the forest, I replied. Going west. Like always.
Did you pass by a lake? She asked. I felt her reaching around me to find other connections. Monsters. She was searching for monsters in the forest to better direct herself. I hadn’t known that she was doing that before. I wondered if I could go with her now because the connection went both ways.
It does not,she scolded me. I severed that connection as soon as I realized what you had done. I’m just letting you see it for yourself, so you can get a better sense of your surroundings.
Dearen knows which way Terlyth is, I replied. We will go there until it’s time to turn north.
That should be fine, Cari replied. There was a momentary pause before she added, It’s getting late. You should sleep.
I felt her leaving me alone. I closed my eyes and listened to the night sounds coming from the forest. Owls howled and the wind blew on the trees above our heads, making the leaves move. It was a peaceful night; I should have been able to sleep now that I knew the monsters would not be visiting our camp at night.
Then, I remembered.
Brigid can see better now,I told Cari. Did you know what I’d done before I did?
No, she responded within seconds. Almost as if she hadn’t gone away like she had said. I just panicked because you had no fear. That can be very dangerous. I thought you might do something you regret if I allowed you to touch Brigid with your healing again.
And I appreciate that, I replied. I might have. It feels like that wasn’t me, but I do remember how I felt, how I was sure that I could fix her with ease, even though that was the first time I had used my healing magic.
Not the first time, Cari corrected me.
Yes, I admitted.
There was a brief silence. The stars kept flickering above, their presence a joy as I felt their gaze upon me. I stared back at them, unwilling to close my eyes. Dearen was keeping watch, but his back was turned to me. I decided it was useless to just lay there, staring at the sky and thinking thoughts.
“I can take over the watch,” I whispered.
Dearen jolted and looked over his shoulder. He did not look sluggish at all, he was fully alert, but I saw his tiredness.
