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“Mom, I never had sex in the club until last night, and eventhen it was a private thing,” Lou admitted.
“He took you to a privacy room because it was your firsttime, baby. Again, that boy knows how to do things properly. I assure you ifhe’s anything like his father he’ll be parading you around soon enough.”
She blushed. “Mom.”
Her mom shrugged, a grin tugging her lips up. “Well, I’venever played at Sanctum, but I have spent many an evening sitting in the loungegossiping while wearing fet wear. You know we shouldgo shopping.”
“Absolutely not. Boundaries, Mom.” They needed to find a fewof those.
“Well, was it bad? Did he not take care of you?”
“You know he did and it was…” Magical. Life changing. “Thesex doesn’t matter.”
“But it does,” her mom insisted. “It’s the only thing you’vebeen lacking. You’ve had an attentive boyfriend for a long time. What youlacked was a situation he felt like he could add to, not take away from. Hecouldn’t fit into your academic career. And then you joined the team and he wason his own team and couldn’t spend time with you the way he should. Now you’rein his world and he’s had to face the idea of losing you and what’s he doing?”
“Talking to my dad, for one thing.” Her stomach turned atthe thought.
“I bet he handles your dad spectacularly. I bet your dadfinally comes to the conclusion I came to a long time ago.”
“What’s that?” Lou asked.
“That you and TJ were one of those couples who were meant tobe,” her mom said softly. “The road might not have been to your liking, butthat part is over if you want it to be. If you can look past your ego and seewhat he’s offering you, you can start this part of your life, and baby, it isthe best part. I’m not saying everything magically gets easy, but knowing youhave someone watching your back, someone who will never leave you, who willalways listen, that’s everything. Now I want you to look back and tell me whathe kept from you all these years? It wasn’t love. He gave that to you. Itwasn’t his help. He moved mountains to get you the things you needed. What did hedeny you?”
Lou struggled to see through the tears that pooled in hereyes. “Sex. That was all. Just sex.”
Her mom nodded sagely. “And he’s offering you that now. He’sready because he sees the place he can have in your life now. You have a manwho thinks of you before himself. Grab him with both hands and honor that love.Take it into your soul, baby girl, and let it warm you for the rest of yourlife. I did. I never regretted it even once. Now, that is all I’m going to say.The rest is your decision, and I need you to understand if you decide you can’trisk it with TJ, I’ll honor that and I won’t ever bring it up again. The onlything I’ll ask you to do is to be kind to him. Maybe help rehab his imagebecause it has to bug him that everyone sees him as the villain and you as theinnocent thing he’s taking advantage of.”
She hadn’t thought about how it would be for him. She’dhalfheartedly pushed back when their friends talked about how he treated her.She’d seen herself as a doormat he wiped his feet on every now and then. Thatwas her problem, not his. That was her damage, and he’d done his best to helpher.
“I’ll talk to them,” she promised. “And I’ll think abouteverything you’ve said. But there’s still the problem of distance. TJ works onthe best team. We rarely get that team as backup. We would still be apart mostof the time.”
Her mom stood up. “I would bet he’ll fix that problem foryou, too. You need a keeper, my sweet girl, and I’m happy he’s finally decidedhe can do the job right. Give it some time. Give yourself some grace. I knowit’s hard, but stop thinking about what it could cost you and start planningyour future.”
Lou stood and hugged her mom. “I’ll try. It’s pretty scary.”
“Well, then it’s good you’re a badass,” her mom whispered.“Another reason for me to love this family we found. I know you think I wantedyou to have some spectacular academic career where you stacked up honors, butthis is a great adventure. This is what I wanted for you. Do I worry you’re in danger?Yes. But I never worry that you aren’t living a life that’s big enough for you.It’s big enough for the both of you. You were brave enough to put your life onthe line for the world you want to live in. Be brave enough to risk your hearton a boy who’s literally loved you half his life.”
Lou’s heart clenched because she knew this talk shouldsoothe something inside her, but it merely made her gut twist. Could they makeit work? Could she believe him?
“I’ve got to get to the bakery. Marley Brighton can bake likean angel, but she’s not so great with customers,” her mom said with a grimace.“She threatened to shove an éclair up a guy’s ass because he didn’t understandthat pastry cream isn’t whipped cream. She’s like the baking equivalent of hermom. I left you macarons. Don’t worry about your dad. He’s letting TJ know thatwe’re here for you both.”
Sure. That was what he was doing. “Don’t plan a weddingyet.”
Her mom stopped at the door, a glint in her eyes. “Me? WouldI do that? Would I get together with Theo and Erin at a nice restaurant wherewe can plan out the rest of your lives and talk about grandbabies? Would I? Idoubt it. By the way, if you need me on Friday night, I’ll be at Top. Maybe youand TJ could take Jayce to a movie or out for pizza?”
“Mom,” she began.
But she was already gone, and Lou was left with a dozenperfectly crafted macarons and a million questions.
* * * *
TJ practically ran into the 4L building, stopping only toshow his security badge. He’d been given one a year ago when he’d helped Louwork on a big project. She’d modified the twins’ cell phones so they werebasically mini laptops with features no one outside of the spy world would everneed or think to put on a phone.
He’d held her spare tweezers as she’d worked on themicrochips and got her lattes and snacks.
It had been a good time.
He was worried he was in for a not so good time thisafternoon, but he was ready. He’d picked up pad see ewfrom her favorite Thai place along with a cold brew that would fuel her throughthe afternoon. He would sit on her couch while she worked and probably fumedhis way, and hopefully she would let him sit in the front seat with her whenthey drove home.
