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“It was. Especially for our boys.”
“Two, right?”
“Gabe and Josiah. They’re sixteen and fourteen.”
He shifted in his seat. “I remember Samuel from high school.”
I laughed. “I would think so after the scandal you two caused.”
Tomás and Samuel had gotten caught in a compromising position, as it had been described in the understatement of the year. The truth was that Tomás had been on his knees, giving Samuel a blow job. Coach Keeling—the homophobic asshole—had seen them, and he’d all but run off to the principal. Coach had tried to get Tomás expelled, but to no avail, since technically, he hadn’t done anything wrong. The gossip had been wild for weeks.
Tomás scratched his beard. “Should I apologize for that?”
“Nah, why would you? I knew about it when he and I reconnected, so it’s never been an issue. I know you two had sex as well. Not surprising, considering no one else was out.”
“You weren’t.”
“No, I didn’t come out till med school, even though my parents knew, and I suspect pretty much everyone in town did as well. But they allowed me to choose the timing of coming out, and I’ve always appreciated that. I wasn’t ready.”
As we chatted, I kept stealing glances at the way his shirt hugged his frame and how his lips curved into a tantalizing smile that made my stomach somersault. Heat rose to my cheeks as I tried to focus on the conversation, but my thoughts kept drifting to that wild idea of asking him to hook up. Flashes of intimate fantasies featuring Tomás and me tangled in passionate embraces shot through my brain.
“I have to go.” Tomás checked his watch. “I promised Tiago I’d help him with something.”
Tomás had always been there for his brother. Tiago had struggled with severe dyslexia—though I hadn’t realized that until much later and wasn’t even sure when he’d officially been diagnosed—and had needed Tomás to help him with a lot of things. Apparently, that hadn’t changed over the years, and Tomás’s care for his brother warmed me inside. “I have to go too. Head back to my practice.”
We both got up and gathered our things, and I waved at Brianna before walking outside.
“It was nice to catch up,” Tomás said.
“Same.” If I wanted to ask him, now would be the time. My stomach churned, the fear of rejection coursing through me. What if he thought I wasn’t attractive enough?
“See you around, Fir.” Tomás held up his hand and walked away.
This was it. I had to act now, or I’d never find the courage. “Wait.”
He turned around. “Did you forget something?”
I took two steps toward him. “Would you want to do this again? Not this specifically, but something more private? Sex, I mean. Would you want that?”
2
TOMÁS
Wait, what?
The shock coursing through me left me speechless. I couldn’t believe that Fir, of all people, was asking me out on a date. The shy, quiet Fir I’d known from high school had grown into a confident man who wasn’t afraid to put himself out there. I admired his courage, which touched me in a way I hadn’t expected. It took balls to ask someone out, but he’d done it.
But mãe de Deus, how did I handle this? I had to let him down gently. A relationship—especially with someone so different from myself—wasn’t what I wanted or needed at this point. But how did I tell him no without hurting him? Fir wasn’t the first guy I’d rejected, but he mattered. Maybe because I knew him and respected the hell out of him for the life he’d built for himself. Or because I’d known he had a crush on me in high school, even though he’d never told me…and I’d never mentioned it.
“Look, Fir.” I chose my words with care. “I appreciate your honesty and the courage it took for you to ask me.”
He swallowed. “You’re not interested?”
Fuck. I needed him to understand this wasn’t about him but about me. The cliché “It’s not you, it’s me” really did apply here. “I think we’re too different, you know? We come from different worlds, and I don’t see how we could make things work between us.”
Fir’s eyes widened, and he opened his mouth, but I quickly continued before he could say anything. “You’re an amazing guy, and I respect what you’ve done with your life. You deserve someone who can give you their all, and I’m not that person. Please don’t take this as a rejection of who you are.”
His expression fell, and I rushed to soften the blow. “Have you tried using a dating app? There are plenty of guys looking for someone like you.”
