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“Thanks, Mom, but I’ve seen my resume,” Buzz said.
“Okay, enough about Buzz’s job crisis. She’s always in one,” Harper cut in as she chopped her remaining cinnamon rolls into squares. “So, Buzz, why were you on the couch this morning? You have a bedroom upstairs now that I’ve moved out.”
“I forgot. And sometimes you stay anyway,” Buzz mumbled. No way was she telling her that her brain was in an orgasm-induced haze when she stumbled in. “Besides, you two both come back all the time, and Sera hasn’t moved out yet.”
“I’m getting there,” Sera stated, though her “getting there” was actually not happening. It was now four days before the wedding, and not a single box had left the house, though her new house was only two blocks down the street and almost completely purchased. They signed the papers the day before the wedding.
“I never stay.” Harper folded her arms and glared at her.
“Last weekend, Kaine said something, and you kicked me out of your room at like three in the morning.”
Harper smiled broadly, and her voice got louder. “He apologized.”
“Not to me!” Buzz yelled back at her. “I’m waiting for Mom to move out. I want the master.”
“Why is everyone yelling?” Agatha suddenly asked from the door. Her black hair was not combed, and she looked like she was still asleep.
“Buzz is trying to steal my bedroom,” Sera told the woman.
“Ick. Mom’s had sex in there a lot.” Agatha grabbed a roll from the pan by her oldest sister, no plate needed.
“Don’t care. I’ve had sex in this kitchen,” Buzz said, pointing to the spot. Sure, it had been years ago and before the extensive recent remodel. Not to mention it didn’t hold a candle to last night, but it had happened. Her mother’s love life was not getting in the way of her getting the biggest room in the house with an attached bathroom. Well, second biggest room. Agatha had an entire floor to herself but no bathroom.
“Me too,” Harper said and pointed at another location, despite her earlier “no-sex in the kitchen” rule, a rule Buzz was sure her oldest sister broke almost as soon as it was made.
“I can’t even count how many times I’ve had sex in here,” Maby said. “If I didn’t already have an entire house, I should get Mom’s room. I’ve already had sex in there.”
“What?!” Sera glared at her. None of the kitchen talk had gotten to her, but her bedroom seemed to cross a line.
“Sorry, Mom.” Maby gave her a side-hug, which Sera shook off.
“Anyone else? My bedroom?” she asked the room.
All heads were shaking, except Agatha, who wasn’t paying attention at all. All eyes turned to her, causing her to look up. “What?”
“Did you have sex in Sera’s room?” Maby asked.
“I have my own room for that.” Agatha pointed at the stairs with her roll. “And a bathroom and a hallway, and this kitchen, and out in the living room. There are even cars.”
“I hope you’re disinfecting in here every day, Harper. Every day,” Sera said, not turning away from the most introverted of all the kids.
“I am now.” Harper also looked at Agatha.
“Really? Do you want me to point out everyone who had sex last night? I can.” She looked around the room, and Buzz squirmed as Agatha grinned at her. Fucking sister with the eye.
“Go ahead,” Sera said. Everyone knew she’d gotten lucky last night. She got lucky every night now.
“Quit bragging, Mom,” Agatha replied and took another bite of her roll.
Buzz sighed in relief. Agatha wasn’t telling.
