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As I walk into the pharmacy, I'm struck by the bright lights and sterile scent that fills the air. With trembling hands, I grip the pregnancy test tightly, feeling as though everything is about to change. For safety, I grab two more.
I pay for the tests, my heart pounding so loudly in my ears that I can barely hear the cashier's polite words. I need to know the truth, no matter how terrifying it may be.
Leaving the store, I clutch the small bag to my chest, steeling myself for whatever comes next.
I return to Dario's apartment, my heart pounding with each step. The small bag containing the pregnancy tests feel like a ticking time bomb in my hand. As I slip inside, I'm grateful to find Dario still locked away in his office, giving me some privacy.
"Hey, I'm back," I call out softly, hoping he won't emerge just yet.
"Alright, bella," he replies, his voice muffled by the heavy wooden door.
I take a deep breath and lock myself in the bathroom, staring down at the box in my hand. My fingers tremble as I rip it open, carefully reading the instructions. With a growing sense of dread, I take the test, then set it on the counter to wait for the result.
Then, I pee on the second and third sticks and lay them beside the first.
"Please, let them be negative," I whisper, my hands clasped together as if in prayer.
I pace the small bathroom, my thoughts racing. What will this mean for my life? For my mission? For my relationship with Dario? Can I even raise a child in this dangerous world?
"Jasmine?" Dario's voice startles me, and I realize I've been in here longer than anticipated. "Is everything okay?"
"Um, yes! Just give me a minute, please," I reply, trying to keep my voice steady.
"Okay, but don't take too long. We need to talk," he says, concern lacing his voice.
"Alright," I promise, my heart sinking further into my chest. What could he possibly want to discuss now, of all times?
As the timer goes off, I brace myself for the result. Picking up the test, I stare at the tiny window, and my heart stops. Two pink lines stare back at me, confirming my worst fears. I'm pregnant. My eyes glaze over the two other tests. Pink lines, yet again.
The tiny bathroom suddenly feels suffocating, as if the walls are closing in on me. Panic rises within me like a tidal wave, threatening to engulf everything I hold dear. Tears well up in my eyes, blurring my vision as I stumble backward, reaching for the edge of the sink to steady myself.
My mind is a whirlwind of chaotic thoughts, each one more terrifying than the last. How could this have happened? How did I let it happen? Images flash before my eyes - secret missions, narrow escapes, and deadly encounters. This is not a world for a child.
My knees buckle, and I sink to the floor, tears streaming down my face. What’s Elena going to say when she finds out? I can kiss my career goodbye. What will Dario say? Even if he is happy, what would happen when he finds out that the only reason I entered his world was to spy on him?
How can I tell him I'm pregnant before I tell him who I am?
I can't. For now, I must hide the truth.
Fear, uncertainty, and questions race through my mind like wildfire. How will this affect my role as a spy? Can I continue working undercover with a baby on the way? The stakes are higher than ever now, and I can't afford to slip up.
I force myself to stand up and face the mirror. My eyes are red and puffy from crying, but I need to stay strong. This isn't just about me anymore; there's another life to consider.
As my hand rests on my still-flat stomach, I try to imagine what the future might hold. Will I be able to balance motherhood and my career? Will the Mafia discover my secret and use it against me? Will Dario stand by me, or will he turn his back on us?
I know I must tell him the truth, but how? Should I tell him now, when our lives are already filled with danger and uncertainty? Or should I wait until things calm down, risking further complications?
I simply don't know what to do, but the one thing I know with certainty is that I will do everything I can to protect my baby.
For now, that begins by making sure the agency doesn't find out because once they know I'm compromised, they'll have me extracted from the mission. I'd lose my job, and probably never be able to speak with Dario again because I'd be relocated and under supervision for the rest of my life.
Eventually, the only way forward would be for me to tell Dario. The question is - when?
The weight of my decisions feel like a thousand pounds on my chest, suffocating me with each breath I take. As I clutch my hands into fists, the sound of footsteps approaching the door pulls me back to reality.
"Jasmine," Dario calls out, through the closed door. "We need to go. My father just called an urgent meeting."
"Right now?" I ask, startled by the sudden change in plans.
