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“No one blames you, Alex. And we won anyway, so it doesn’t matter. Just get your head in the game for the next time, okay? Don’t let all of this outside stuff get in the way of hockey because once you do that, there’s no turning back. It’s a slippery slope that many athletes have fallen down. Do you remember that baseball player?”
“Which one?”
“Exactly,” Benjamin cries out, landing what I can now see is a joke. “You don’t even remember him because one mess-up was the beginning of the end. Don’t let that be you.”
I swallow hard and nod. “I know. I won’t. That was just a one-time thing. You’ll see.”
I’m not sure if the media will see it like that, though. I know how it works; they will be searching for any possible slip-up to hold over my head and to prove that I’m ‘losing it’ for a while. Until someone else, someone more interesting, makes a mistake for them to leap on.
I rise to my feet and start to dress, thinking only of Riley.
She needs protecting at the moment,I remind myself before I get too downhearted.She just wants to feel safe. Nothing else matters.
I shouldn’t be so worried about myself, not when Riley has so much going on. I need to remain upright and strong for her.
Chapter 15—Riley
“This is a nightmare,” I groan as I hold my aching head, no longer having the appetite for my cake. Delicious as it is, I feel sick to my stomach. “What am I going to do?”
Sara has been trying her hardest to make me feel better ever since I got here, but even she’s gone ashen at the never-ending notifications that are blasting through my phone.
“I don’t know what to say,” my friend admits as she drops the phone on the counter. “That’s awful. All of this stuff… It’s just terrible. I can’t believe what people will say online.”
“This is why my mother wants me to come back to Cold Springs,” I moan. “But I already told her I can’t go. Not now. Not when I need to get this story written. Not when I’mjuststarting to get the sort of work I want.”
Sara sighs heavily before she leans across the counter to look into my eyes. She needs me to hear what she’s going to say, so I give her all of my focus.
“I know why you’re so determined to stay, Riley. I know better than anyone else why you’re working so hard to make it as a sports journalist. You’re doing this because of your father. Because you want to follow in his footsteps and make his memory proud, but youknowhe wouldn’t want you to put yourself in danger, right? He wouldn’t want you to be suffering all of this. This is alot.” She pauses, but I don’t have anything to say back. I don’t know what I’m thinking at the moment; my head is all over the place. “I’m the last person who wants you to leave. I love having you here, but at the same time, all this stuff…”
“So, you agree with Mom?” I snap, a little too harshly.
“I don’t know.” She offers me a one-shouldered shrug. “I don’t know what the right thing to do is. But I do want you to be safe.”
“There’s no guarantee that any of these threats will come to light. And there’s no way I can be sure that going home will keep me safe. Cold Springs might not be much safer than the city. I don’t want to bring any of this to my mother’s home either.”
Sara frowns thoughtfully. “I suppose. But at the same time, I’m concerned that people can use your job to get to you here. These doxing threats are scary.”
I hang my head low, concern ricocheting through my whole body. I know she’s right, and that my mom is, too. I can’t ignore the fact that they both have my best interests at heart. But I just can’t do it. Something is keeping me here in New York City, and I think I know what it is.
“But… What about Alex?”
I guess that’s the real problem here, isn’t it? He’s been there for me, and he’s keeping me strong at the moment. I’m afraid of leaving him behind and losing him in the process. Maybe this whole mess will tear us apart anyway—chances are it probably will—but I don’t want to push that. There’s a flutter in my heart every single time I think about him, and that means…
Well, I don’t know what that means yet, but I’m sure I’ll figure it out over time.
Ring, ring…
My heart damn near stops beating as someone calls me. It’s only when I see Mom’s name on my screen that I allow myself to relax just a little bit. As long as it isn’t a journalist trying to get some kind of story from me, I don’t care so much. Although Ido have to admit that I do wish it was Alex letting me know that he’s finally coming to see me. I don’t know what he’s doing at the moment, but I’m sure he’s busy—stuck in this whirlwind on his own.
I’m sure we won’t be able to just see one another whenever we want now, not while everything is so crazy, but it has to calm down eventually, right?
“Mom, are you okay?” It hasn’t been that long since I last talked to her, so I don’t know what this could be about.
“Riley, I’m worried.” Shit, my spine immediately bolts up straighter. I can hear the fear lacing her tone. “People are attacking me online. I don’t know how they’ve found me or how they know that I’m your mother, but it’s bad…”
I try my hardest to swallow down the thick ball of emotion that lodges itself at the base of my throat, but it isn’t going anywhere. If Mom has been found, then she might be doxxed as well. The chances of me being located have just grown exponentially.
“What… what do you mean?” I run my fingers anxiously through my hair. “What’s been said, Mom? I haven’t seen anything targeting you.”
