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Hesat in silence for a few more minutes, feeling about a hundred pounds lighter than he had when he’d first arrived, and he realized now that trying to pretend his grief wasn’t there had only been feeding it.Hehadn’t wanted to feel it because grieving sucked.Andbecause acknowledging that grief would’ve made his father’s death more real.Butit was real no matter how much he shoved down his feelings.
Sonow he was feeling his grief, and he was still standing.Stillbreathing and functioning.Maybehe always would’ve been able to face it this way because difficult emotions were still just emotions, fleeting and temporary.Ormaybe it was because lovingHazelhad strengthened his heart, making it stronger, the feelings within it more assured.
Handsin the pockets of his open coat, he walked slowly back to the car, taking in everything around him.Groundinghimself in the present moment with the colors of the leaves, the scent of the air, the sound of birds chirping, the feel of the weakening sun on his face.Hisheart kicked happily against his ribs when he sawHazelleaning against the car, gazing off into the distance, lost in thought.
Hepaused, wanting a moment to observe her before she saw him.Toappreciate the way the sun made her hair look like burnished bronze, the way her eyelashes cast shadows on her cheeks.Theway her full lips were turned slightly upward, as though she was thinking about something pleasant.
Atwig crunched beneath his boot as he started forward again, and she turned in his direction, a bright smile lighting up her face.Shepushed off of the car and met him halfway, sliding her arms around his waist.
“Youokay?” she asked, her fingers skating along the crease of his spine.
“Yeah.Iam.Ineeded to do that.”Hedipped his head, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Thankyou for coming with me.”
“Ofcourse,” she said, snuggling into him. “Anythingyou need.”
Ineed you to promise me you’ll stay.Notjust while we’re working on the book.Butstay.
Thewords seared through him, and he held her tighter, as though if he squeezed her hard enough now, he could change whatever might happen in the future.Itwas easy to picture a future with her, wrapped up in their littleGossamerFallsbubble.Butwhat happened if the book was dead in the water?Whathappened if she went back to the city?Heswallowed thickly, knowing he needed to talk to her about his feelings, but letting fear hold him back.
“Ijust need you,” he said, the words muffled against her hair.Itwas the best he could do for now, until he found the words to explain to her that she was already the owner of his heart.
“You’vegot me,” she answered.
Andfor now, her answer was enough.
TWENTY-FOUR
Hazelhad learnedfrom bothAdamandAutumnthatSundaydinners at theShephardhouse were kind of a big deal.Everyonewas expected to attend if able, and it was almost always just the actualShephards.So, the fact thatAdam’smother had invited her was a big deal.Abig deal because it meant she andAdamwere headed somewhere serious—something she already knew, even if they’d only talked about it in abstract terms so far—and a big deal because making a good first impression mattered.Thesepeople were important toAdam, and therefore, she wanted them to like her, becauseAdamwas important to her.
Shewas already friends withAutumn, so that was oneShepharddown.Theyhad coffee together at least once a week, texted all the time, sent memes onInstagram.She’deven run into her at theMysticMusethe other day.
Truthbe told, she loved the shape her life had taken inGossamerFalls.Wakingup inAdam’sbed to the sound of him typing away in the next room, the scent of coffee wafting gently on the air.Afterbreakfast, they’d head to the hotel together, where she still kept a room in case the common areas weren’t conducive to creativity.Sheoften joked about the size of the tab she must be racking up, butAdamassured her that no bill would be coming her way.Sheaccepted that kindness, but only with the assurance that if the room was needed for a paying guest, he’d kick her out.
She’dspend the morning reading overAdam’spages, making some notes, and then writing her own pages, which she’d then add to their sharedGoogledoc.They’deat lunch together, and then she’d spend some time on her own during the afternoons while he worked, hiking, shopping, walking.She’dbecome a regular at bothDejaBrew, andAllBookedUp, the charming bookstore in the town’s core.Afterward, she andAdamwould head back to his place where they’d have dinner together and discuss that day’s writing.Oncethe dishes were cleared, they’d cozy up on the couch together, reading, or watching a movie.Itusually wasn’t long before they were making out instead.Sometimesthey didn’t even make it up to the bedroom.Infact, just yesterday, he’d hauled her up onto the kitchen island and—
“Whatare you thinking about?” he asked, shooting her a grin.Hedrove confidently, with one wrist draped over the steering wheel as he navigated the streets through town from his cabin to his mother’s house.
“Whenyou ate my pussy on the kitchen island last night,” she answered honestly.Hercheeks flamed, and her clit pulsed at the memory of his mouth on her, licking her slowly, over and over again, like she had the world’s most delicious ice cream between her legs.
Hegroaned softly. “Youcan’t say things like that when we’re about to have dinner with my family,” he complained, but she knew he was teasing.
“Hey, you asked,Ianswered,” she said with a little shrug, and he chuckled.Asilence fell as they turned downCedarStreet, and she blinked rapidly, her earlier nerves returning with a vengeance.Shesmoothed her hands over her thighs, trying to wipe away the clamminess.Butdespite her nerves, she had no desire to bail.Shewanted to meet his family.Itwas important.Itmattered.Sheclosed her eyes and inhaled slowly, trying to pull in some semblance of calm.
“Don’tbe nervous, sweetheart,” saidAdam, reaching over and laying a big hand on her thigh. “They’regoing to love you.Justbe yourself.Iknow it’s a lot, butI’llbe with you the whole time, andIpromise you, they’re all excited that you’re coming.It’sgonna be fine.”
Shenodded, laying her hand over his on her leg, the heat of his touch seeping through her jeans. “Iknow.Ijust…Iwant them to like me.WhatifImake a bad first impression?”
“Thenthey’ll tease you about it mercilessly in the future.”
Herstomach dipped and swirled at the word future.Moreand more, she became certain that was what she wanted withAdam.Afuture.Whichmeant winning over his family, who meant the world to him, was important.
Hesqueezed her leg affectionately. “I’mglad you’re here,” he said. “Eventhough you’re nervous.”
“I’mnervous because it matters.”
Hepulled the car to a stop at the curb in front of a large colonial, lights glowing warmly from within.Hecut the ignition and then he leaned across the center console, cupped her face, and kissed her, sweetly and softly. “You’regonna do great,” he said, kissing her on the forehead and pulling away.Thekiss settled the worst of her nerves, and she took one last deep breath as she undid her seatbelt and retrieved the two desserts they’d picked up atYouLittleTart—an apple pie, and a chocolate cake with an orange glaze that looked like something out of a magazine.Adamgrabbed the two bottles of wine they’d brought, and they headed up the steps to the wide front porch together.
Heopened the front door without hesitation, and the sounds of classical music and warm voices greeted her as they stepped inside.Afire crackled in the fireplace in the living room to the right, but it seemed as though all of the voices were coming from the kitchen.
