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“For weeks, from the moment I woke up after the surgery, all I saw when I looked at it was my ineptitude. I’d failed to do my job. I put my colleagues, other agents who were good at their jobs, at risk. I’d disobeyed orders because I thought I knew what was best. And you know what? I blamed you. I blamed the person who sent that tip. Because of that tip, my boss called me into his office that morning and told me he was pulling me from the case. That was a case I’d worked on for months. I was the lead agent on that case, and it was the first time I got to be lead. Do you know what that means?”
Hallie didn’t, but it sounded important and clearly meant a lot to Blake.
“I was no longer going to be the rookie. The newbie. I was about to become the real deal. Not that I wasn’t, but you know, it’s all about perception. I damn near lost it when my boss told me to stand down. I told him it wasn’t fair. That it was my case. Said I deserved to see it through. He told me I could follow up on it after the team had done their thing. Then he dismissed me. I was furious. I drove like hell to that location, only there were already barriers up where I had planned the entry, so I had to drive around the block and come in on the other side. I left my ride, and I ran into the action, gun drawn. Next thing I knew, I felt a burning sensation in my shoulder and I was down.”
Hallie sat, listening to every word.
“I blamed you, the messenger, for what happened to me that day. I was so sure that if whoever sent that tip hadn’t done it, I would’ve been allowed to do my job the way I was supposed to and none of this would’ve happened. And that blame spread through me like a poison.”
He stopped talking for a moment to put his shirt back on and sit in the oversized chair across from her. “When Caden told me over breakfast one day that you were the one who sent that tip, I saw red. I questioned if you were dangerous. I made him think he had to choose between you and his job, his badge. My actions and my words are what drove him away from you. It’s why you two spent all those weeks apart.”
A tear slid down Hallie’s cheek and she quickly swiped it away. She didn’t know what to say.
“I blamed you, Hallie, when I should’ve thanked you. There were a few empty vehicles parked where I was supposed to have entered the scene that day. They were shot to hell. Two of them, beyond repair.” He inhaled sharply.” You are the reason those vehicles were shot to hell and I was only shot in the shoulder instead of the head. Make no mistake, if you hadn’t sent that tip, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now.”
Drawing in a ragged breath, Hallie was overwhelmed by his words. She wanted to hug him, to thank him for being honest and open with her. “I was so relieved you were okay. I’d never done anything like that before.”
“I’ll be just fine. Thanks to you.”
“There’s something I should tell you before you go out and make me into some kind of hero.” She hadn’t told Caden or Orly yet, but Blake deserved to know.
He raised an eyebrow and again made eye contact with her. It felt good that he was finally acknowledging her presence.
“You asked me before, but I didn’t answer, because I was too ashamed. I haven’t told anyone, not even Caden.”
Blake smirked, and for the first time, she noticed the undeniable and even sexy boyish charm about him some woman would find irresistible. “You can tell me anything at this point, Hallie. You’ll still be the hero.”
She shook her head. There was nothing heroic about what she did. “I first saw the glimpse of your badge and that warrant a week before I sent that tip.”
“Okay,” he said, as though she hadn’t just admitted her most heinous sin.
Maybe he didn’t understand. “I was scared. Sending a message to the FBI with an anonymous tip about one of their agents getting hurt...it was so freaking terrifying. I kept putting it off, making excuses, thinking it wasn’t possible I’d seen something I could actually act on. But I kept seeing it, over and over, and finally, I got the courage and sent the tip.” She paused, hesitating before saying the rest. “I’m so sorry Blake. I sent that message the day before it happened. I didn’t know when it would happen. I could’ve been too late. I could’ve been the reason you were killed that day.”
“Bullshit,” Blake spat out without hesitation. “Even if you’d done nothing and I would’ve been killed, it still wouldn’t have been your fault. It would’ve been the fault of the guy who pulled the trigger. As for what actually happened, I’m the one who disobeyed orders that day. I’m the one who’s been walking around with a damn chip on my shoulder, trying to prove myself to everyone. And there’s something else you should consider before feeling guilty for waiting until the day before. If you had sent in that tip earlier, my boss would’ve probably called me in sooner, and I would’ve had time to straighten things out with him and put myself back in action, exactly where I had planned to be. I would’ve been killed just the same, as if you hadn’t sent that tip in at all. Everything you did, regardless of what drove those actions, went toward saving my life, Hallie. You might think your gift is useless, but I’m living proof that it’s not.”
“I was so sure you’d hate me when you found out that I waited so long. I don’t even know how to tell Caden that his friend could’ve died if I’d waited even one more day, just because I’d been scared.”
“That man loves you so much. He’d tell you what I’m about to tell you. You were right to be scared. Look at what the FBI has done since you sent that tip. They dragged you in for questioning twice. They took out a warrant on your computers, and put you under surveillance, which you’re probably still under.”
Her thoughts immediately went to Caden and how he was risking everything to be with her. When she didn’t say anything, Blake said, “I’d do something about it, but aside from my medical leave, I’m also suspended for three months, so all I can do is tell you that my friends and I, especially Caden, won’t let them get to you.”
His words seemed to lift a weight that had been sitting in her gut, which she hadn’t even been aware of until right now. “Thanks. I just wish this was all over already.”
Her cell phone rang then. She pulled it out of her purse and saw it was Caden calling. “Hey, I’m still at Garrett’s. What’d you find?”
“Hallie, it’s Luke. Caden was hurt. He’s on his way to the hospital now. Martin and I are following the ambulance. Let me talk to Blake, then he can drive you over.”
Chapter 30
When Hallie arrived at the hospital emergency room waiting area with Blake following close behind, there was a sea of people there, coughing, crying, and talking all at once. She stopped near the entrance, her eyes searching, for what she wasn’t sure.
Blake gently took her by the arm and guided her past a group of people to where Luke and Martin stood in the far corner of the room. Luke had a gash on his forehead, and Martin’s arm was wrapped in a bandage. “There was a pile up on the freeway,” Martin explained. “Another Fire Chief took it after I heard about what the guys were looking into at the church, but as soon as I got there, all hell broke loose. By the way, Luke told me about your gift. I can’t imagine what you’ve been through.”
“Thanks,” Hallie said, but she could only think about Caden right now. “What happened? How did you two get hurt? Is Caden okay?”
“He’ll be fine.” Luke brushed his fingers over the gash. “And that’s just a scratch.”
“A minor hazard of the work we do,” Martin said, gesturing with his bandaged arm. “No big deal.”
