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“Hey, it’s okay,” I reassured him softly, reaching out to place a comforting hand on his arm. “You don’t have to go any further if you don’t want to. We’re just trying to help you, Zander. I promise.”
“Thank you,” he said, his eyes still unfocused and distant. “I just…I wish I could remember more. It’s like there’s something important, something I need to know, but it’s just out of reach.”
“You’ll get there,” I told him with conviction, squeezing his arm gently before releasing it.
Zander’s skin went pale, and his eyes glossed over again, his gaze becoming distant and unfocused. The shift in hisexpression was spooky. He seemed to check out as he stared blankly at the wall.
“Zander? Hey, Zander, are you okay?” I asked cautiously.
Suddenly, with no prior sign of what was about to happen, his face contorted in pain and confusion, and he erupted into a full-blown berserk state. He jerked out of bed, throwing himself from one side of the room to the other. Zander tripped over the visitor’s chair, and he went down hard. For a moment, I thought it was over, but as suddenly as he’d fallen, he was back on his feet, grabbing the chair and launching it across the room. The chair shattered when it hit the wall, the pieces falling to the floor with a clatter. He threw himself at the walls, and I wasn’t sure if he was trying to escape or knock himself out.
Lola and I hit the floor, crawling towards one another. Fear was etched across Lola’s features, an expression that mirrored my own. The noises coming from Zander were devoid of coherent meaning, unlike anything I’d ever heard from a human or an animal. He was pulling the sheet off the bed, ripping it up like tissue paper.
Lola and I slowly crept towards the wall where the alarm was. “Help!” Lola shouted shrilly as she hit the alarm.
I knew Zander needed to be restrained before he seriously hurt himself or someone else. Without any more hesitation, I lunged to my feet. We collided, and I struggled to hold on to him as he thrashed violently, his madness fueling his strength. My wolf and I battled the rage and anger flowing out of Zander. He was twice my size, and it took every ounce of strength I had to keep hold of him.
“Zander, stop!” I yelled, my muscles straining against his relentless resistance. “You’re going to hurt yourself.”
“Get off me!” His snarled words were barely recognizable through his rage.
I ignored the sting of skin scraped raw and the ache of bruises forming on my body. I refused to let go. If I didn’t contain his wrath, the consequences could be disastrous.
“Please, Zander,” I pleaded through the burn of tears. This was all my fault. Guilt pounded at my temples. “Fight this.” I gritted my teeth as I fought to maintain my hold on him.
Finally, the doctors and nurses arrived, rushing to join me as we tried to subdue Zander. His powerful body bucked and twisted, and he shoved me against the wall, knocking my breath from my lungs.
“Sedate him!” one doctor shouted over the chaos as another grabbed a syringe filled with a potent tranquilizer.
As the needle plunged into Zander’s arm, he weakened. His movements became sluggish, his eyes rolling back into his head as the sedative took effect. With one last shudder, he collapsed, unconscious.
“Is he going to be okay?” I asked, my voice cracking as Lola helped me to stand. One nurse came to my side to check me over. I waved her off with a tight smile and stared down at Zander’s limp form.
“We’ll do everything we can.” The doctor’s grim expression did nothing to reassure me. “I’m afraid we’re dealing with something beyond our understanding.”
“Right,” I said.
Lola and I stepped out of the room so the doctors could do what they needed without distractions. Both of us were shaken by what we’d just experienced.
“I didn’t know that would happen,” I said, sick with guilt. “I never meant to hurt him.”
Despite her worried look, Lola took my hand. “Tori, this wasn’t your fault. I was there in the room with you. Zander is grappling with the psychological toll of being separated from his wolf. We’re in uncharted territory here. I can’t even beginto imagine what it must be like to be disconnected from a fundamental part of yourself the way he is. It must be tormenting his mind. The sooner we have answers, the happier we’ll all be. No one likes to watch him suffer like this. Please stop blaming yourself.”
“Is he getting worse?” I asked, dreading the answer. Worse, I hated the stress it was putting on Lola—not only did she care about her patient, but this was Zander. She had deeper emotions playing in the mix where he was concerned.
“Every time we try to bring up old memories or anything connected to shifting, it triggers something violent and dangerous in him,” Lola said. “The doctors say these episodes are taking a massive toll on his body. I’m seriously worried about him.”
“You’re doing an amazing job with him,” I reassured her. “Zander’s lucky to have you in his corner.”
But Lola didn’t seem to be listening. She just watched Zander through the window in the hospital room door.
“Come on.” I put an arm around her shoulders. “Let’s get out of here for a bit. We both need a break.”
Reluctantly, Lola let me lead her to the waiting room. I wanted to take her outside for some fresh air, but she said she couldn’t leave without talking to the doctor first. She wanted a status update, then she’d head back to her office to do more research. There was no denying the psychiatrist was strongly motivated to fix Zander in any way possible.
I sighed, knowing I needed to bite the bullet and call Ridge to tell him what had happened. Ridge deserved to know about the situation with his pack. If he discovered I had been injured, even slightly, and hadn’t told him, it would create problems I didn’t want to deal with.
“Hey, Ridge,” I began when he picked up, trying to steady my voice. “We need to talk. Something happened with Zander...”
