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She hasn’t looked at me. She says it into the breeze as if she’s asking the universe instead.
“Not in that way, no,” I reply quietly.
She bites her lip, focusing on a seagull that soars past us. “She probably needs to know that.”
I sigh. “I never meant to lead her on. But I should have been more clear with her when I left her that night.”
She smiles at something I’ve said, like she’s having her own humorous internal monologue at my expense.
“What is it?” I raise an eyebrow.
With a smirk, she turns to me. “Clearly, we both have a problem leaving people hanging in the bedroom.”
I hold her gaze with a smirk of my own. “Yeah, I think we both oughta work on that one.”
She sinks further into the seat and rests her elbow on the edge of the car, looking across the ocean again as we ascend to our final rotation on the ride.
I keep my eyes on her for a moment more before glancing away. As much as I wishfully believe I’m finally starting to see her as a friend, I’m equally realizing that growing a friendship with her is causing my feelings to grow too. I won’t be able to just be friends with Sophie. There are only two options: I can let her go completely, or I can jump in headfirst and take the risk.
Friendship only comes with the latter. And friendship is quickly tipping the scales in the direction that scares me the most.
TWENTY-ONE
Sophie
“My BED…Leah. I invited Kai into my bed.” I pace around my room, pressing my hand to my face in epic embarrassment. “I might as well have said, ‘Hey, Kai, thanks for being so responsible and keeping your promise, but would you please sleep right next to me tonight anyway?’”
It's obvious that she’s trying not to smile. “Well, was it nice? Sleeping next to him?”
I groan and slump down onto the sofa, shaking my head. “I was in a weird place. I barely realized what was happening.” In the moment, the request hadn’t felt out of place at all. As soon as he settled in, I drifted away from reality so easily. I’ve spent so long thinking Kai is the one I should be afraid of, but he’s turned out to be the one who makes me feel safest; the one I trust most.
“Did he seem uncomfortable with it?” Leah asks, leaning against the counter.
“Not really… He didn’t even bring it up at all yesterday. Maybe he’s so used to being in women’s beds that this was just another typical night for him.” I grimace. Maybe that is exactly where we are different.
Leah shakes her head. “Well, I’m glad he was there for you. And I’m glad he got the creep fired.”
“Yeah,” I sigh. Nick is gone now. It all happened so fast. I wouldn’t have had the guts to turn him in, but Kai did so without an ounce of hesitation. I questioned his insistence at first, not wanting to draw attention, but now, without Nick lingering around, I can finally breathe.
It’s freeing. Ever since I walked into that room almost three months ago for my first dialect coaching session, those icy blue eyes pierced into mine, filled with sinister motives. Kai was spot-on with his assessment of me. I gave Nick the benefit of the doubt, ignoring the dangerous signs and choosing to see the little bit of good in him instead. But the good that hides somewhere in Nick was never worth my time.
“So, what’s your schedule today?” she asks, moving on from the topic with ease.
I appreciate her for that. I’ve seen a few other castmates since Monday’s ordeal, and it’s reminded me why I didn’t want to make such a fuss about the whole thing in the first place. Everyone’s all “are you ok?” and “do you need anything Sophie?” as if I’m frightened, injured, and need their sympathy.
I don’t.
Maureen stared at me with wide, concerned eyes when she checked on me last night, and for once, I understood her. Like me, she can barely believe Nick went so far.
It was scary, but I’ve been hurt worse. Even though I went willingly into that night with Jarrett last year, I lost a much bigger piece of myself. Even though he didn’t force himself on me like Nick did, he did take something from me that night. That’s what hurts the most. Nick never got that chance. Not with Kai there to step in.
“We have rehearsals this morning,” I reply to Leah. “And then we have a promotional photoshoot at the Conservatory Garden in Central Park. They’re planning to film the show and sell it to a streaming platform, so the producers need photos that will give it a cinematic feel.”
“How are you feeling about…” she clears her throat, “rehearsing with Kai?”
I shake my head. We haven’t kissed in almost a week. “I’m ok, really.”
“Okay.” She nods. “Cause if you’re worried about it, you should probably talk to him…or the director.”
