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Wiz smiled. “Oh, the menacing stare is very convincing. Let’s try one where we’re both looking at each other and see which one would make him madder.” She handed the phone back to him and turned toward him again.
He held out the phone. “Ready? Say cherish.” He smiled down at her. The camera clicked, but she wasn’t paying any attention to it. No, she kept looking at him, and he gazed down at her. He finally broke their stare and handed the phone back to her. Then he swallowed, hard, and met her eyes again. “Wiz?”
“Yes?” She couldn’t get a deep breath, and warmth rose in her body.
“I’d really like to kiss you. Do you think that would be too much? It’s okay if it’s too soon.” A tiny smile lifted the corners of his lips.
It was her turn to swallow hard. “I think... I think I’d like that.” She could barely whisper.
Leaving one hand lightly on her shoulder, he brought his other hand up to her cheek. He brushed his thumb over her lips and up her cheekbone, barely touching the side of her head with his fingertips. Then he lowered his head to hers and kissed her gently, just barely meeting her lips.
His lips were firm but soft. His touch firmed, deepening the kiss slightly without pushing, keeping his lips closed. He kept his fingertips on her cheek and the other hand on her shoulder, feathering his fingers in a caress but not moving to other parts of her body. He was being so careful with her, and she felt precious and safe.
She slid her arms around his neck. He kissed a little harder, then pulled away. Still holding her, he blinked, a tiny smile rising. “You are so sweet.” He cupped one side of her face, lightly. “I just can’t understand how anyone could ever hurt you.” He kissed her again, and it was just as wonderful.
All she could think of was “more.” She opened her mouth a little, and he copied her, kissing her a little harder but still not pushing. Oh. He was following her lead, not taking anything she wasn’t willing to offer.
So, she gave. She pressed a little harder and swept her tongue just under his upper lip. He groaned, and his fingers tightened, and his tongue teased her mouth.
She rose on her tiptoes, firming her grip, cupping the back of his neck.
He pulled his lips away. “Would a hug be all right?”
She nodded and stepped into him, wrapping her arms around his waist. He put his arms around her upper back and rested his cheek against the top of her head. His voice rolled through her. “That was... that was amazing, love. And I really, really don’t want to stop, but I have to, or you won’t have time to think.” He loosened his arms, but she tightened hers and pressed into him a little harder. He hugged her firmly. She wasn’t scared but felt treasured and special. It had been so long since a man’s touch brought her joy. They stood there, wrapped around each other, for a long time. Finally, he broke the silence. “Will you tell me what you’re thinking?”
She nodded against his chest, but she was having trouble getting the words out around the lump in her throat. She might burst into tears, and that would give him the wrong idea entirely. She blinked and swallowed.
He chuckled, the sound rumbling through her chest. He loosened his arms again and said, “How about we go sit down on the couch, and I’ll tell you what I’m thinking. Then you can tell me when and if you’re ready.”
She stepped out of his embrace and shivered, slightly chilled away from his warmth. He walked with her to the couch, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. Before he sat, he handed her phone back and tugged her down, pulling her under his arm so she was nestled up against his side, with her head on his chest. “Is this okay?”
His body was warm and firm and his arm solid over her shoulders, but not confining or constricting. “Yes.”
“First, I’ll never push you for anything you don’t want to give. If you want to be just friends, we’ll do that. If we can kiss and cuddle on the couch, I’ll be ecstatic. Never, ever think that you owe me anything. Your friendship is vital, and I never want to lose it. I understand that your feelings might change from day to day. Tomorrow, you might not want me to hug or kiss you, and that’s fine.” He clasped her a little tighter, then shrugged. “But you have to tell me. I’m a man, and I’m not the most enlightened person on the planet. I might not pick up on something subtle. Words are best. Please.”
Wiz nodded. “Okay, but you have to do the same. I don’t always pick up on signals either. Tell me what you want or need, even if you think it will make me uncomfortable.”
Tom released her slightly, bent, and gazed into her eyes, with a small smile. “Deal. Now, if someday we go further physically, you still don’t owe me anything. Even if you made me the luckiest guy on the planet someday, you could change your mind the next day, or in the next minute, and that’s absolutely your choice. I won’t take that decision from you. I’m certain you experienced some sort of horrible trauma. I know you might not ever tell me what happened to you, and that’s okay too. I’d be honored if you confided in me, but I understand if you don’t. It’s your life, your mind, your body. You have all the control.” He pulled his arm away and shifted to face her. “Do you believe me?” He held out his hands, palms up, to her.
She mirrored him and put her hands in his. “Yes. At least in my head. But it may take a while before I can really internalize it. Same with trusting you. I do trust you, but...”
He smiled gently. “Just tell me. I don’t want to play games with you. That’s the second thing. I already know that I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But again, this is going to go at your speed, not mine. We might not ever get there. Just be my friend.” He squeezed her hands carefully.
Astonishment swept over her like a tsunami. Wiz wasn’t sure what to say. “You love me? You don’t even know my name!” He couldn’t possibly love her. They’d only known each other for a few short months. But... she trusted him and Pete more than anyone else, even more that Ryan and Erin.
Tom laughed and squeezed her hands. “Like I care. Names are just a label. You’re who you are. You’ve labeled yourself, rather than sticking with the label somebody else gave you. It suits you.” He smiled and shrugged. “Besides, I didn’t fall in love with your name or the way you look, although you’re beautiful. I fell in love with who you are inside, your heart.” He pointed at her chest, at her heart, then ran the back of his fingers just under her clavicle, with her hand still gripped in his. Wiz’s heart, already beating hard, sped to double-time, and her face and chest warmed. “I fell in love with your compassion and bravery and intelligence. Everything else is unimportant.”
She squeezed her eyes shut for a few moments, then opened them. He was still there, still holding her hands. “You can’t be for real. I don’t get stuff like this. I...” He was too good to be true. No one loved her, not really. Not when the chips fell. And they always did.
He shook his head slowly, smiling ever so slightly. “Love, you deserve way more than me. I’m just a rancher with fancy boots. I’m nobody important or particularly smart or special in any way. I’m pretty sure that I’m way older than you are too. You’re way more than I’ll ever be, and I’m proud to call you friend. That’s enough. But if you think there’s even a tiny chance you could love me someday, I’ll be the happiest man on earth.”
Her face heated and her heart throbbed. His grip on her hands was the only thing that kept her from running, even though she didn’t want to leave him. Not ever. “I... I don’t know what to say, except that you are smart and special and all those things you said you weren’t. I’m not.” She’d practically wailed the words like a child.
He squeezed and released her hands. “It’s okay. I know I’m pushing too hard, and it’s an emotional overload. But I want to get it all out in front of you, so you can think about it. Then you can decide how you really feel and not just react. Okay?”
She nodded, but she couldn’t force any words out. She missed the feel of her hands on his but couldn’t reach for him, either.
He swallowed hard, and his smile faded a little. “Third, if you don’t return my feelings, can’t even be friends with me, I want you to know that won’t change the relationship between you and my dad. I’ll always love you and want you, but if you can only be my sister, even my estranged sister, well, then that’s what it is, and I’ll suck it up.” He gave her a rueful look. “You’ll have to put up with my puppy love looks, but don’t let that keep you away from your family. Because we are your family, first. I’d like to have a different family relationship with you, but if you don’t, then we won’t. I’ll deal. Got it?”
