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At least she hadn’t until now, when her compassion and her ‘heat’ kicked in.
The island was facing an ‘intruder’ and a missing dragoness. She was pregnant and relieved of duty.
This was not a good time. Everything was falling apart all at once, and she didn’t know what to try to fix first.
Obviously, the pregnancy couldn’t be fixed. Not until the child was ready to emerge.
As much as she had bonded with Jori, a bond which was still not yet complete, she didn’t know if she could fully trust him. How could she know he was genuine, and not just infiltrating? If that were the case, then he’d done a mighty fine job of fooling her and twisting her around his finger. She’d gone full in for him and was teetering on completely loyal mate devotion and utter humiliation.
She was a guardian commander for dragonsakes! This was so far below her; it was no wonder she’d been removed from command. She deserved it.
Her people really were at risk, and she hadn’t been able to see it, she was so lost in lust and hormonal shift.
And her mother! Her mother was gleeful for its consequences.
Kymri never in her life would have thought that her mother wanted grandchildren. Never. She’d barely been a mother to her, how could she have guessed? Was she desperate to make up for lost motherly bonding, she was hoping to do it with Kymri’s offspring?
She dropped back on to her pillow, blowing out her breath, staring up at the ornately carved beams supporting the arched ceiling.
She still felt like her uterus harbored a stone.
She was in such a mess.
She couldn’t even go to her best friend Marli because she was still missing, and it may be her fault.
She’d let down her guard.
If she’d been facing one of her subordinates, she not only would have had them relieved of duty, she might have even banished her.
Perhaps that’s what she should do. Leave. No longer fit to serve her queen and people.
If she bore a dragoness, she could give her to her mother. But her dragon didn’t like that idea.
If she bore a male child… then what?
Her breath lodged in her chest. Then what? Her mind seemed to go blank. She didn’t know.
Her dragon didn’t like the idea of sending away a male child either. And she knew he wouldn’t be welcome on the island. He wouldn’t be forbidden, nor would he be welcome.
Male younglings were sent away to live with their fathers, given to a tribe that takes male children or abandoned ones.
Her dragon growled.
Normally Kymri’s dragon was silent on things, lately, with the excess hormones driving her natural instincts, she was become more proactive in Kymri’s choices.
How long had it been since she actually took her dragon’s wishes into account? Maybe she should be asking why her dragon had sunk to the back of her consciousness for so long?
Maybe because she’d become such a damned control freak, she’d been shutting her dragon out. And now in matters of dragon importance, her dragon was making her wishes known.
Maybe it was time to listen. Maybe this is why she was so out of balance with the coming of her heat.
Her mother, and the archival books, had said that metal dragons sometimes did this when out of balance, allowing her ambition to silence what never should be. She wasn’t in true union with her dragon. She used her warrior nature but repressed everything else to her will. Apparently, her dragon had had enough of that, when faced with the opportunity to complete her dragon duty by having offspring. No matter how hard she’d tried to deny it and take control of her own life, her body and her instinct had decided otherwise.
What of Jori?
Could she trust her choice?
She’d been raised to mistrust males. They were the enemy, and were only good for procreation. Kymri never wanted to destroy him. She never wanted to mate for life and procreate either. But now she’d bonded, which meant in effect, life. And procreated, which also meant life.
