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Releasing one of her hands, I lower her leg, hitching it over my hip so that her heels press into my arse. Folding over her, I lie onto her chest as I give her exactly what she asked for. I give her me, and I take all of her until her pained sobs morph into pleasured cries.
My swan comes undone, shattering for me as I break for her. Georgina might be my destruction. Our love may be the death of me.
But what better way could there be to die than loving her? Better yet, than being loved by her?
Chapter 19
GEORGINA
The sun is beating down in full force as we sit on the beach. Heavers Hall has its own private cove. Surrounded by tall cliffs, it feels as though it’s at the world’s end. With nothing but the sprawling sea ahead of us, the only thing on my mind is the fact that Freddie is lying beside me, fingertips stroking my thigh while we soak up the sun together.
Not alone though, because once I asked Arabella to borrow one of her swimsuits, she invited herself and Fleur along. Obviously, Cassie needed a break from all the wedding planning, so Fleur made sure she came too. Of course, the three of them couldn’t come on their own, so Casper, Christopher, and Leo had to join us also.
“Don’t take her into the sea yet!” Fleur calls to Casper as he and Christopher meander down to the edge of the water.
Grace is laughing away as Casper holds her hands. Her tiny feet rest on top of his while he babbles down at her.
“You realise they have no intention of listening to you, don’t you?” Arabella laughs at her.
“Of course not. Daddy’s as crazy about the water as she is.”
“Just imagine, next summer there’ll be three little ones to enjoy all this with,” Cassie sighs, sitting back into Leo.
“So you are up the duff!” Fleur squeals, clapping her hands in celebration.
Clearly her maths has gone down the shitter along with her sleep.
“Do the math, short arse,” Freddie grumbles beside me.
So much for peace, quiet, and alone time after they spent most of yesterday in their crisis talks, leaving me to fend off Fleur and Arabella and all their questions. I ended up hiding in with Beck most of the afternoon. I think if I had known the way, I would’ve gone back to the lake. I want to go back there and open every door, turn over every stone to discover more of Freddie.
As much as it’s tainted with pain and loss, there’s something about Heather Hill that feels welcoming. Maybe it’s the desolation it’s shrouded in calling to mine, but I think it’s more. I think there are some places that exist to be a part of our souls, and there’s something in me that tells me that’s where we belong. That it’s our home. The luscious purple, lilac, and green fields of heather are a sight to behold in the early morning mist, and as we rode away the other day, I could see us walking them together in the chilly mornings and rolling around in the sunny afternoons.
However, until Freddie decides to take me back, it doesn’t feel right to return, even if I could. So instead, I closed myself off in his bedroom and waited for him. When he finally came to bed, Freddie was clearly stressed. Although he won’t tell me he’s worried about Lucy, I know it’s a great cause of his anxiety. Even if a part of me wants to pretend she doesn’t exist, I can’t. I just need to find the right time to talk to him about it. After the other night, he’s been quieter. It’s obvious that it took a lot out of him to be so open with me. It only seems fair that I make things easier for him.
“I’m pregnant, you’re pregnant…and there’s Grace,” Arabella chuckles lightly, sunning her face and neck.
“One, two, three.” Freddie holds up three fingers.
“Yes, I know how to count, dickhead.” Holding up the same three fingers as him, Fleur then proceeds to count backwards, “Three, two…oh look, one!”
Giving him the finger, she lies back, shuffling completely into the shade of her parasol.
“Swim?” Freddie asks, sitting up beside me and pulling me onto his lap before he pushes to his feet.
“Were you asking or telling?”
“Both,” he chuckles low, cradling me in his arms as he strides to the sea, taking us in the opposite direction to the rock pools Casper and Christopher are paddling around in with Grace.
“Are you doing okay?” I ask Freddie as he wades into the water silently.
If there’s something I’m certain of, it’s that he’s not entirely happy. Maybe it’s the invasion into our time together, but I think it’s more than that.
“You can talk to me about anything at all. No matter where we are, because it will always stay between us.” When I touch my forehead to his, he nods, stopping in his tracks as the cool water threatens to lap at me.
“I want to take you out to dinner tonight,” he says out of nowhere, so matter-of-fact that it sounds more like an order than a request.
“You keep feeding me and I’m going to be the size of a house in no time.”
