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I growl, fighting myself, fighting the need I have for this woman. I have to let her go. I have to let her find a man who can take care of her… a man who can make her happy. I’m not that man. I don’t know that I’ll ever be that man. Not after everything that has happened. All I want in this moment is to use her. I want desperately to satisfy urges that have gone unattended for far too long.
Her gaze is cutting me like a knife. Here she is, delivered to me like a dream. Sweet, beautiful, amazing Piper. The one who delivered me through the darkest days of my entire life. I owe so much to this girl, so much that I can never truly repay. I can start right now by making sure I never hurt her.
“Piper,” my voice is hard and gruff, I don’t hold back, I don’t leave room for any misunderstandings. “We can’t do this. Matt is dead. I’m Matthew and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay out of this room until I find a place of my own.” A dangerous note tinges my tone, punctuating my warning with dark finality.
I watch the fear return to her gaze, driving away the tenderness that had softened her beautiful features. Hurt fills her blue eyes, hurt and confusion, but it’s nothing compared to what she would endure if I didn’t nip this in the bud. A sting now to save her from suffering through the real agony later. Someday I know she’ll thank me for this moment, but it’s a small consolation when the real prize is dragging her into my bed and making her scream my name.
In a blink she recovers, I see the real emotion driven off her face, overtaken by a cold, hard mask. Anger boils in her eyes, making the blue sharp and piercing, it sends a shiver down my body, not of fear, but of lust. If I thought she was pretty before, she’s twice as gorgeous when she’s furious!
She tries to shove me back, but she’s not strong enough to budge me. “I’ll stay out of your way.” She shoves again and this time I push off the wall and take a step back, giving her space.
The way she looks up at me cuts through my chest like a hot lance. For a fleeting second I want to tug her into my arms and beg her forgiveness. I never want to see that devastated expression on her face again, I could never endure it a second time. I’m eternally thankful that an icy glare replaces it or my resolve would have surely evaporated. The weight of the world comes off my shoulders as she steps out the door.
I resist the urge to charge to the threshold and pull her back. Instead I grab the door and swing it shut so hard the whole house shudders upon impact. I stand there for a good five minutes fuming, my hands clenched into fists at my sides. I still want to chase her down and fuck her on every surface in this house. I know I’ve made the right decision in pushing her away, but I can’t help but wish things could be different.
As my temper drains away, I sit down on the edge of my bed and run my palm over the smooth comforter. The image of Piper bent over the mattress comes to me, and that’s all I can think of as I fall asleep.
