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My blood feels like ice in my veins as he puts the car into park and pulls out the keys. My eyes dart all around looking for something to defend myself with—a weapon, anything hard that can be used as one, but all I have is my purse. I don’t even have mace on my keychain.
Daniel rolls the windows down and squeezes my thigh happily before he gets out of the car and walks around to my side. I feel like I’m sweating. What’s wrong with me? I can’t calm down. He pulls the door open and holds out his hand to me.
“Sofia?” he asks and bends at the waist to see what’s taking me so long. “Are you really not feeling well?”
I can’t let him know how terrified I am. I’m being silly. This is just a normal thing. Ofcourse,he wants to be alone with his date. Wasn’tIthe one making a big deal about wanting to have privacy earlier? He’s just respecting my wishes.
I plaster a smile on my face and shake my head. I take his hand and turn to exit the car gracefully. “I sometimes get car sick. Still adjusting to the extra pressure in the air up here.”
It’s a pathetic excuse but he seems to accept it.
Then I stand up and look around to see where he's taken me. We've pulled over to an overlook. A steep cliff face ahead offers a panoramic view of our town. The sparse lights flicker from the homes and businesses, and I can see for miles. For a brief moment, the beauty of the setting overcomes my fear. From this vantage point, the beauty of the town overwhelms me.
Even more wonderful are thestars.
One of the things that I loved the most about Nikolai’s home outside of Moscow was that I could see the night sky so perfectly. I used to love sitting out on our bedroom balcony with a cup of cocoa. I would spend hours listening to music and watching the stars when he was away. When Nikolai was home, I would have him make love to me forhoursunder those same beautiful stars.
It was sort of poetic that it was the very same balcony I loved so much that he tried to murder me on.
These are the same stars that I have always gazed upon and loved so deeply, but it feels different now. Of course, Daniel wanted to bring me here. He likely heard that it was the most romantic place in the whole town, and I feel stupid for getting so worked up about it.
A night breeze pushes through the trees around us carrying with it the scent of white pine.
I need to get a grip. I almost tried to attack him. I was plotting my escape from him moments ago, and this is just a man who wanted to share something beautiful with me. Shame on me.
I wrap my arms around myself to stave off the slight chill in the air. He’s already confirmed what Amy, the English teacher, told me earlier about his intentions to help make the town a better place.
Maybe this is just the spot that inspired him to do so.
My gut is trying to steer me wrong. Plain and simple.
CHAPTERTWELVE
Helena
“Oh wow,” I breathe. A moment later, Daniel wraps his coat around me. The musky scent of him covers me everywhere. All I can breathe is him as his warmth surrounds me. He steps closer behind me, and I await his touch. I expect him to wrap his arms around me, and if I’m being perfectly honest with myself, I need it. Ineedto feel the security of being in a man’s strong arms again.
I feel like if he could just hold me, if he could just squeeze me tight to his chest, that I could close my eyes and pretend that I truly am all of the things that I’m pretending to be. A woman down on her luck, who is even less fortunate in love, finds a generous, wealthy man to take care of her. I can be a woman who likes to stare at the stars again. That’s the woman I want to be more than anything.
“Do you like it?” Daniel asks. Somehow, it sounds as if he’s whispering directly in my ear, and it sends a thrill down my spine. “It’s one of the first places that I discovered when I was scoping out the town for business. I fell in love with the view. I knew I needed to settle here just so that I could come to this spot whenever I wanted.”
“It’s beautiful…I can’t believe that I never knew this was here.” I can’t seem to settle on one thing. I can’t understand everything that I’m seeing. The tops of oak and pine trees stretch for miles. They fade into the distant gray mountains. I can't even see the tops of them from where I am. I can only see where they meet the clouds. But it's what's above them that I prefer over everything else.
I wish I could chart out the stars above me all at once. I could sit here forhours.
“Thank you so much for bringing me here and sharing this with me.”
I nudge him with my shoulder, hoping that might encourage him to touch me, but he just smiles.
“Who knew that the man who pushed me up against a wall this afternoon could be such a gentleman,” I push further and bat my eyelashes at him.
“When the situation calls for it.” He answers, but something darkens in his expression. The innuendo in his voice tells me that in other situations he can be just the opposite. Exactly how I like it. Accommodating in the streets, controlling in the sheets.
“My turn for a question?” I ask.
“Go ahead.” Daniel turns to face me, his hands in his pockets.
I turn to face him, reluctantly taking my gaze away from the stars. I take a step forward to bridge the gap between us. If he doesn't make the 'end-of-the-night move,' I will. I'm not an easy woman, but I know what I want—and right now, I want him to give in to the same desires that drove him to pin me against the wall earlier. I want him to rail me beneath these magnificent stars. I believe that if he does, it will somehow restore balance to my soul.
