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“You don’t have to go.” His voice is a gritty whisper.
“I do, though.” Because staying will only make this harder in the end.
His expression flattens. “It’s been fun. See you when I see you.” He gives me his back and disappears down the ladder, still completely naked. He doesn’t even take his clothes with him.
I lie on the futon, trying to catch my breath, covered in sweat and an unreasonable amount of bodily fluids, and wonder how someone who can make me feel so damn good one second can also make me feel so damn bad the next. Until now, I always knew what I was getting with Tristan. Sure, he could be an asshole, but at least he was honest about what he wanted. Dealing with an honest dick was a hell of a lot better than a guy who broke it off with me, moved across the country, sent I-miss-you messages, and a few weeks later started dating someone else. But all that honesty is out the window now. And I can’t keep doing this to myself.
I don’t have time to wallow in self-loathing, or Tristan-loathing, because five minutes later, the girls show up. At least I’m dressed again.
Hemi and Hammer both wrinkle their noses when they see me. Tally just smiles because she’s still sweet and innocent.
“Oh, girl. The freshly fucked vibe is strong.” Hemi pats me on the shoulder.
“So is the freshly fucked scent,” Hammer mutters.
“One day, hopefully in the not-too-distant future, I’ll be able to personally identify the freshly fucked vibe and scent,” Tally announces.
“We’re all going to hell,” I say.
“At least we’re going together,” Hemi replies brightly.
“Where are your roommates?” Hammer asks.
“Tristan is in his bedroom, and Flip is at some promo thing?” I end on a question because I don’t really know where Flip is. He and I aren’t exchanging more than grunts and side-eyes.
“He’s with Dallas. They’re selling pierogis at a church bazaar. Dallas hates the smell of sauerkraut, so it’s perfect for him.” Hemi’s smile is downright evil.
“You’re a mean one, Miss Grinst.” I motion to my half-full bin at the bottom of the ladder. “I got distracted, but it shouldn’t take long to pack the rest of my stuff.”
“You and I can pass stuff down to Hemi and Tally,” Hammer offers.
“That’d be great.”
Hammer follows me up the ladder. She takes in the huge wet spot on the futon. “Needed one last round, eh?”
I nod. It sucks that we’ve ended on such a low note. That he pulled out in the middle of an orgasm and came on my thighs basically sums up the entirety of our messed-up non-relationship.
“Need a hug?” she asks quietly.
“Later. I’ll probably cry, and I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing or hearing me lose it,” I whisper.
“Fair. Let’s get your stuff and get out of here.”
I throw clothes into the bin at the bottom of the ladder, including Tristan’s shirt, boxers, and jogging pants. Finders keepers. When that bin is full, I toss my remaining clothes into another one, make sure I have all my things, and lower the other bins down.
I grab my stuff from the bathroom, fill a cooler bag with fridge items, and do one last check to make sure I have everything. Tally and Hemi both take a bin full of clothes, and Hammer and I each take one end of the heavier bin.
Tristan’s door remains closed as we file out into the hall. It’s not a surprise. But it hurts. A lot. We’re quiet as we trek down the hall to the elevator. Dred, the woman who lives across the hall, holds the elevator door for us and eyes the tote bins. “You find your own place?”
“Yeah.”
“Hopefully I’ll still see you around when you come visit,” she says with a smile.
“Yeah, for sure.” I lie, because I plan to be angry at Flip for a long time.
“Who was that?” Hammer asks once the doors close.
“Our next-door neighbor,” I explain. “Flip is friends with her.”
“Like friends with benefits, friends?” Hemi asks.
“Surprisingly no. They’re totally platonic.”
“I sort of expected Tristan to come running out and ask you to stay,” Tally says as we head for the lobby.
“Tristan doesn’t do vulnerable. He doesn’t even really do feelings.” I tip my chin up even as it trembles. Feelings are annoying and inconvenient. Especially when they’re not reciprocated.
“Are you okay?” Hemi asks softly.
“I’m fine. I’ll be fine. It was just sex. That’s all we were doing. Just fucking each other.” Which is why it feels like my heart has been ripped out of my chest, stomped on, and kicked into a meat grinder. “It’s better that it’s over.”
Two stupid tears leak out of the corners of my eyes.
Tally’s arms come around my waist first. Then Hammer’s and Hemi’s.
“Men are idiots,” Hemi says.
“Tristan’s a dick,” Hammer says.
