AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I nibble my lip, looking at Journey as she stands in the middle of the living room, watching our departure with interest. I blow out a breath when I reach her, running my fingers through her curly hair.
"Are you worried I'll leave, too?" she asks, tipping her chin up.
No. I'm not worried she'll leave. I know she will. There's no worrying about it. I'm just eager to hear why Jericho is so adamant about this.
I shrug, leaning in to kiss her cheek, too. When I pull back, I offer her a soft smile, trying to convey the words I cannot speak. Instead, I hand her a tiny note, telling her to eat. It’s something she doesn’t seem to do enough of. If it were up to me, I’d have her in the kitchen right now, hand feeding her the special lasagna I made specifically for her. It’s her favorite. Something I’ve made for her and her mom multiple times over the years since I’ve kept my eyes on her.
Her expression softens when she reads the note. “Is there something special for me in the fridge?” Those moss-green eyes I could get lost in, examine my face, stalling on the long scar, lining my cheek. I see the question in her eyes. The—who did this to you—question lingering on her tongue.
But she doesn’t ask. And I’m not ready to give a piece of myself up like that.
I nod my answer, wishing I could speak again. But something holds me back, even though she didn’t seem to.
"Shepp?" she asks softly as I run my fingers over her lips. "Can you... Can you speak?" she asks with hesitation, furrowing her brows.
My heart leaps from my chest.
“I had a dream about you,” she whispers, looking away as I continue tracing her plump lower lip, wishing I could kiss her. “I had a dream you were…” She shakes her head. “You were there, and you soothed me when I was crying.”
Well, she’s not far off from the truth. I was there. I did soothe her. But to her, my voice was only in a dream. For now, I’ll keep it that way.
When people see me signing, they assume that I'm either deaf or mute. Technically, I still have my voice. My vocal cords are there, buried deep, and unwilling to resurface. Only when I need them most. Like the night in her bedroom.
My father took it from me, just like he wanted to. And even though he's dead, I still haven't spoken a word since that night, other than to Journey.
"Open your goddamn mouth, you ungrateful shit," he slurs, pulling my lips apart with such force that tears fill my eyes. A scream falls from my throat when I lose the battle, and it clamps around my tongue, holding it still.
"I didn't! I won't tell again!" I try to shriek as sobs roar through me. “I’ll be good!” I try to shout through the metal resting on my tongue, making it impossible to move it. My heart pounds so violently in my chest that I swear it’s about to escape and run away like I want to.
My breath shudders at the stark memory of my father and the night he stole my voice for his own gain.
Fingers brush against my cheek when I open my eyes, and Journey stares at me with concern, bringing me back from the brink of having to relive my nightmare over and over.
I nod.
"But you don't?" she asks softly.
I smile, nodding. It's more complicated than what I'm leaving her with. But I have to.
‘I have to go,’ I sign, knowing she'll never understand what I'm trying to say. I could speak to her again. If only I could get myself to do it. My words are frozen in my throat, unable to filter through. So, I continue doing what I know how to do—signing. ‘I haven't spoken a word since I was ten. My father took that from me like he took a lot of things without asking. One day, I'll find the courage to fully use my voice again. But today is not the day.’ Maybe not any day. I've lived without my voice for so long that maybe it doesn’t want to ever come out again. Maybe it was her distress that called it out.
Journey's brows furrow. "I'm sorry. I don't understand sign language."
‘Not yet though, huh?’ I sign with a smile; digging into my pocket, I pull out a notebook and a pen. I could have done this from the very beginning and given her my words written down. But where's the fun in that?
One day you will. Be good. Eat the lasagna.
Ripping off the piece of another piece of paper, I lay it in her hands, reminding her for a second time to eat. Without looking over my shoulder at her reaction, I make my way out of the house and into the driver's seat of our SUV. Arrow and Jericho bicker in the backseat in a heated conversation when I start the vehicle up and throw it into gear, making our way down the mile-long drive toward the gates. Thankfully, our cars have sensors on them to open the gate without having to stop and do it manually. For anyone else, they'd be stopped and have to speak with our guard stationed at the entrance.
"What's your verdict, Sheppy Boy? Do you think it's smart to leave her here all alone? I told Jer we should hog-tie her and put her in the trunk with a gag. At least we'd know where she was while we bend our knees," Arrow says with way too much glee, thinking about the blood we're about to spill in the name of the Viotto Crime Family.
It’s not enough we have to lower ourselves to our knees and basically worship Jericho’s father and the rest of his bosses. We bleed for them to show our loyalty. One long cut down the center of our chest, almost over our hearts. Blood out for the family.
‘She's going to run,’ I quickly sign when we stop at the end of the drive and pull onto the main road. But she also wants to stay. She wants to figure us out, like we do her. But she won't unpeel our layers without us finding out her secrets first. It's just how it works in our house.
"Of course she is," Jericho scoffs. "The only question is to where and why?"
Arrow's grin grows as I look between him in the rearview mirror and the dark road ahead. "Oh, I have a fun idea as to where she'll go. Doesn't matter, anyway. My Kitten is tracked."
