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Traffic passed me on the side street and I watched the cars, praying that one of them was my Uber, a silver Toyota. The app said the driver was five minutes away, but five minutes couldn’t pass fast enough.
I looked up and spotted my Uber three cars back. I broke into a jog toward the car and waved when I got close. The driver was young and he waved back, and I ran to the back seat when he pulled over.
“TJ?”
“Yes.” I closed the car door behind me. “How fast can you get me home?”
“As fast as you want.”
“Go, it’s an emergency.”
•••
“Mango!” I threw myself on the rug and looked under the couch, and she was lying on her side. Her eyes were closed.
No.I reached my hand under her, but she didn’t wake up.
Please God.Frantic, I took her by the scruff of the neck and slid her out from under the couch. She roused slightly.
“Mango, it’s okay!” I lay her on my lap, drowsy but alive. I picked up the needle, made the little tent, and injected her, then I jumped up with her and flew outside into the waiting Uber.
“Go, go, go,” I told the driver.
•••
At the emergency vet, I washed my face in the bathroom, trying to keep it together. The walls were painted daffodil yellow and lined with framed posters of a dalmatian puppy, a calico kitten, and a lop-eared bunny. I’d never been in a nicer public bathroom; the only dirty thing was me. I’d gone so low that I couldn’t compete with a toilet.
I rinsed my face, willing myself back to the land of the living. The vet tech had taken Mango away as soon as I’d brought her in. The shot I’d given her had no effect, and they told me they’d speak with me after they’d examined her.
I turned off the water and dried my face with paper towels, then rubbed my finger on my teeth for a toothbrush. I finger-combed my hair and smoothed down my clothes, dry now.
I met my gaze in the mirror, horrified at the wretch in my reflection. I looked positively haunted, my eyes bloodshot and puffy and my face bloated from the binge.
I’ll take care of you, honey.
I had an epiphany, eyeing myself. I hadn’t taken care of Mango because when I drank, I wasn’t taking care of myself. It was time to change, this time forever and for good.
I left the bathroom to find out whether my cat lived or died.
•••
“Thank you!” I threw my arms around a startled Dr. Schiller, an older veterinarian, who laughed good-naturedly.
“You’re welcome, I’m happy we were able to help.”
“You have no idea how much this means to me!” I wiped my eyes, trying to get it together. I hadn’t cried the whole time I was waiting to hear, but now the waterworks gushed. “I swear to God, this is never going to happen again, I’m going to take better care of her.”
“It’s important to keep up with the shots. You got her here in the nick of time.”
“Thank you, God.” I sent up a thankful prayer. I’d prayed more in the last few hours than in my whole life. “I know, I’ve learned my lesson. I swear to you, you can’t even know.”
“We have to keep her here tonight. We need to hydrate and observe her. I trust that will be okay with you?”
“Yes, yes, yes, can I see her?”
“No. We don’t allow anyone in the back.”
“Okay, I get it, she doesn’t like me anyway.”
