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“Don’t go freaking out on me, please,” I plead, trying in vain to close the gap between us.
She begins to pace, her breathing growing more erratic. “Don’t you think things are moving a little too fast and getting too serious?”
Her question causes my heart to sink, panic and anger swirling in my gut. “No.” I shake my head, running my hands through my hair. “What the hell are you talking about? Things are going great between us. Don’t let someone saying something about me loving you cause you to hit the brakes.”
Her pacing stops as she finally meets my gaze and wraps her arms around herself. “Is what she said true? Are you in love with me, Brenden?”
With a harsh exhale, I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. I may not have the courage to say the words yet, but she should know how I feel. I’m not the one who’s been holding back.
“Oh god,” she cries out. “I can’t do this. I’m sorry, but I’m not ready for all of this, Brenden.”
“Bullshit,” I challenge, stepping up to her and cupping her face with my hands.
Her wet eyes and blotchy face are clear indicators that she doesn’t mean what she’s saying. She’s scared. I’ve tried to be patient and understanding, but I can’t take this shit anymore. It’s tearing me up inside, never feeling certain where her heart lies while she possesses mine.
“Nothing’s changed here,” I remind her. “Stop trying to run away from what we have. I fucking love you, Elizabeth Shea. I. Love. You. And ready or not, I know you love me too.”
I use my thumbs to wipe away her tears as they begin to stream down her face. “Maybe I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but today I know I love you and want to be with you—only you. How can you possibly see that as a bad thing?”
She closes her eyes, pulling my hands from her face. “Because I think you want something more than I can give you.”
Her words echo my worst fear, and a sharp pain ripples through my chest. “I know I’m asking you to take a risk on me, and that you’re afraid. Hell, I’m fucking terrified too, but I’m still willing to take that risk on you. Are you not willing to do the same for me?”
The moments of silence that follow speak volumes, giving me my answer loud and clear. But I have to hear her say it.
She takes a deep breath, her throat bobbing as she swallows. Just as her mouth moves to speak, the front door opens, allowing loud music and laughter to flow out from inside the house, drawing her attention.
“Lizzy?” My jaw works back and forth.
Her eyes fall to the ground, her shoulders slumping as she shakes her head.
My vision blurs, unwilling to accept what I’m seeing, my lungs burning from the lack of oxygen.
“I should go,” she says in a near whisper, before turning away from me.
My heart stutters in protest, begging me to chase after her as she hurries to her car, but I keep my feet planted.
If she doesn’t feel the same way about me, I’ve got to let her go.
