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Neither of them were going anywhere tonight.
52
Urgh.
His stupid brain wouldn’t stop.
He couldn’t sleep.
Around three in the morning, Loki decided to get up so he didn’t wake Isa.
But it was too hard to leave the room. He couldn’t take his eyes off his girl.
What if that bastard had hit her? Had hurt her? What if he’d tried when Loki hadn’t been there?
He could have raped her.
Killed her.
Loki couldn’t lose her. He couldn’t let her out of his sight. Not ever again.
His breath seized in his lungs. He couldn’t breathe. His hands grabbed his throat, trying to force air into them.
“Loki?”
Remy’s voice penetrated the haze of panic.
“Fuck, Loki! Breathe. Fucking breathe.” Remy jumped up and strode over to where he sat on Isa’s armchair in the corner of the room. “You need to breathe.”
“What’s wrong? What’s going on?”
Shit. They’d woken Tink.
“Loki’s having a panic attack, I think. He can’t breathe. Loki, focus on me.”
Remy crouched in front of him, placing his hand on Loki’s chest. “Breathe with me. In. One. Two. Hold. Out. One. Two.”
Isa crouched next to Remy. There wasn’t enough light to see her face. But he was certain they had to be looking at him like he was a fuckup.
A nuisance.
Because that’s exactly what he was.
“Everything is all right, Ki-Ki. You’re safe. I’m safe.”
But he couldn’t keep her safe. What if something was seriously wrong with her?
“Breathe with me,” Isa said calmly. “Here, squeeze my hand.”
She grabbed hold of Loki’s hand and he squeezed.
“Good, now raise your hand above your head.”
The simple task helped him calm down.
“Now, turn your head to the left. Hey, that’s to the right!” She grinned at him.
As his breathing eased, his self-hatred grew.
