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“First, I want to thank you for how wonderfully patient and helpful you’ve been during my mourning. You’ve lent me your shoulder to cry on and your ears to talk off with fond memories of my husband—”
“But?”
“But…I’m trying to move on…with you. I applaud you for not being jealous or spiteful of my love for Rory, and your efforts of keeping his memory alive are amazing—”
“But?”
My rejection fear lessened a little when the corner of her lips tugged into a slight smile.
“But I think it says something that I’m no longer wearing my wedding ring. Don’t you think?”
“You may have a point. It was silly of me, wasn’t it?”
“No, it wasn’t silly. It was incredibly thoughtful, but I have enough precious things that remind me of Rory. I have my ring, our pictures, his bike, and most of all, his daughter. I will never ever forget Rory Houston, but I think we should make our own memories with our own precious things. I love your idea of passing it on to Kiyah when she’s old enough to appreciate it. You can decide when the time is right,” she said, closing the lid and sliding the box towards me. “You’ve made it perfectly clear that Rory will always be celebrated, and I love you for that, butno more Rory gifts for me, okay?” Kierra asked with tears in her eyes.
“No more Rory gifts,” I confirmed, slipping the necklace into my pocket.
“I’m sorry,” Kierra apologized.
“There’s no need for an apology. Your feelings are valid, but may I say something?”
“Of course.”
“I hope I’m not speaking out of turn, but I don’t want you to believe that now that we are romantically involved that you must take the express lane through grief to appease me. You can take as long as you need; I’ll always be here.”
“And I appreciate that, Jonathan, but I think I’m trying to say that I want it to be Kierra and Jonathan—not Kierra, Rory, and Jonathan. You giving me a safe space to mourn is a beautiful gift in itself.”
I smiled weakly, not knowing what to say in return. Our talk was eye-opening and necessary, but I couldn’t help but feel that despite Kierra’s affirming words that I was still waiting for the other shoe to drop when the holidays rolled around.
Only time will tell, I guess. I should focus on making the next few weeks as stress-free as possible for Kierra.
“Thank you for trusting me enough to be vulnerable with me,” I said, grabbing her hand from across the table.
“You make it easy, Jon, but remember, you can trust me too.”
I sobered, reminded of our earlier fight because of Eliza and my lies.
“I know I can. How about we order some dessert and hit the casino?”
Kierra grinned. “I’ll never turn down dessert. Can we go to Bellagio? I’ve always wanted to see the fountain show.”
“Whatever you want, as long as I don’t have to jump out of a plane again.”
* * *
We entered Bellagio hand-in-hand after watching the fountain show twice. Kierra was mesmerized the first time and forgot to record the show for the kids, forcing us to stick around for another thirty minutes. We strolled through the hotel leisurely, not in a rush to get anywhere because we knew we had all night. I wasn’t shocked that Kierra wasn’t impressed by my desire to window shop. She scrunched her face up at a leather handbag that was proudly displayed under several spotlights and cursed under her breath once she noticed the price tag. I offered to buy it for her, but she quickly told me she couldn’t eat a purse before tugging me away.
“How much do you want me to put on your card?” I asked as we approached the cashier.
“On my card? What card?”
“Your card for the slot machine.”
Kierra chuckled. “Slots…that’s cute, Jon…real cute. I want chips.”
“Chips, huh? Blackjack?”
“Good old-fashioned Texas Hold ‘em.”
