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Grey ducks back into the car. “Good luck to you, Ben.”
I do not wish him the same.
The car is still there when my mother joins me but I say nothing to her about who is inside. For the second time today I climb into the backseat of a police cruiser. I’d like to ask to be dropped off at Camden’s, however the sight of a cop car in front of her house will only bring neighborhood gossip and I’ve already caused her family enough grief for now.
The cop turns onto our street and pulls up to the curb. It’s the first time I’ve ever felt glad at the sight of the slate colored house we’ve occupied ever since arriving in Devil Valley. Plenty of times I’ve been guilty of thinking of this place as a dump. I was comparing it to my old house, my old life. I’ll never do that again.
Last night’s trauma combined with a lack of sleep is catching up to me and I need a shower before I can think straight and go to Camden. When I emerge I find my mother seated at the kitchen table, still in her party dress, staring out the window.
She sighs when she hears my footsteps. “I called for a car to the airport. It’ll be here in two hours.” She swallows hard and turns painful eyes to me. “Bennet, I’m so sorry.”
She could be apologizing for the fact that I can’t hide from being a Drexler. Or she could be talking about the unpleasant chore facing me in Coral Beach. Or maybe she’s sorry because in a moment of weakness she obviously confided in Dirtbag.
“I don’t blame you,” I tell her. “I don’t blame you for anything.”
“You should. You were just a boy and you wanted to tell the truth. You wanted justice for your father. I took that opportunity away from you.”
“You were being a parent. You did what you thought you had to.”
“And look where it got us.” She takes a long, bitter look at our surroundings. “Look at the kind of life I gave you.”
I slide into a chair and wait until I’m sure I have her attention before I tell her the truth. “Mom, I like my life here.”
“No, you were supposed to have better than this. The best schools, the right connections, the nicest things….” She puts a hand over her mouth.
I gaze out the window and I’m thinking of Camden and her family. I’m aware that the people I knew back in Coral Beach would have laughed at Camden’s house. They would have turned their nose up at Devil Valley. They never would have associated with people like the Cushings. They would have assumed they were too good for everything and everyone around here. They would have been so very wrong.
“We’re lucky. We have everything we need.” I stand up. “Look, I need to go out for a little while.”
She frowns. “You should pack. I’m not sure how long we’ll need to be there.”
“I’m going to see Camden. I can walk.”
She touches my arm. “Ben, take the car. Please.”
“I will. Thanks.”
“What are you going to tell her?”
“Everything.”
She looks down and nods. “Yes. You should tell her everything.”
“I’ll be back before the ride to the airport shows up.”
“Bennet?” Her eyes lift and now they are full of tears. “I want you to know that you are the best part of my life. I’m so proud of you. He would be proud of you too.”
In response I reach for my wallet and locate an object in one of the interior pockets. It was one of the only possessions I took from the Coral Beach house and I’ve never shown it to my mother. I’ve never shown it to anyone. Now I lay it on the table in front of her.
I don’t know when it was taken. He looks far younger here than I remember him. It’s a profile shot and he’s on a boat with the wind in his hair while he faces the ocean. From his expression it seems he was in the middle of laughing. This is how I like to remember him.
Her eyes widen when she sees the photo and then a tear falls down her cheek. But ultimately she smiles.
I take the keys from the nail beside the door. “We should talk about him.”
“Yes.” She nods. “We should.”
When I get to Camden’s house, Frankie is outside, talking to some of the neighborhood girls. He grins and waves when he sees me.
