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Too good for me, too good for this life.
I needed to keep her out of it, even if she thought she was part of the life. I was certain Silvio Orsini kept his daughters as sheltered as he could.
Adriana had no idea what I was capable of.
The day passed by slowly, and when it was dark, I made my way downstairs and drove to my father’s club, The Crooked Thorn.
I stepped into the dark room, the low vibes and smoke wrapping soothingly around me. My father already had a drink poured out for me on the counter. I approached, and his shrewd eyes studied my face.
“Did you see sense, lad?” he asked as I downed my drink.
“It’s too late, Dad,” I said, clenching my fists for fear of wrapping them around his neck. “I can’t...it’s not right. I can’t do this.”
Malachy’s eyes narrowed as he reached over and poured me another drink. “Let’s talk in my office,” he said.
He stood up and dragged his fingers through the greying scruff on his chin, descending into the office that was partially lit by fake candles. The room smelled of smoke and whiskey and leather, and it made me queasy.
I followed reluctantly behind him, handing my empty glass over to an employee who was lurking in the shadows. He took it without a word and closed the door behind us, leaving us alone.
“We spoke about this well before I brought it to Silvio Orsini,” my dad said as he sat down behind his almost-barren desk before pouring another drink for us both. “You said you were ready to do whatever was necessary for the family.”
“I am,” I replied, meeting his eyes despite the fear making my heart hammer. That was one of the lessons he’d drilled into me; always look people in the eyes, even if they are scaring you. “I understand that this is bigger than me. That’s why I chose to get to know her. I...”
He held up his hand. “Is this about pussy, son?” he said. “Because it doesn’t matter who you’re married to, you can get pussy anywhere. The ring doesn’t stop a thing.”
The idea of ever cheating on Adriana made me genuinely queasy. “No,” I said. “It’s about the fact that she’s a person and I don’t want to use her for political gain.”
“And now you’re going to back out from an agreement with the Orsini family, dishonor Silvio Orsini’s daughter and dishonor the agreement you made with your own family,” he said. “Because she was so good in bed, right?”
He was doing it. He was drawing the line. I ground my teeth together and tried to keep my voice as even as possible. “Because…”
“Be a man, Tristan,” my father said, his voice steely. “You may not like what you’re being asked to do, but that doesn’t mean you run away from your obligations.”
“What does it mean then?” I spat. “It’s a little more than a business transaction, Dad. It’s marriage. It’s for life.”
His voice dropped to a tone of such cold anger that it actually silenced me. “You can’t act like you don’t have a choice,” he growled. “You always have a choice. You could run away, live on a beach somewhere with some slut sleeping by your side. You can leave Kieran in charge of everything. God knows your brother should’ve been heir, but you’re my firstborn and I’m trying to do the right thing.”
I sat down heavily in the chair across from him, my head spinning. He was right, I always had a choice, but what kind of choice was this? It wasn’t like choosing between different flavors of ice cream or which car to buy. This was my life, my future, and my happiness on the line.
“I don’t want to dishonor anyone, Dad,” I said after I finally felt like I could, my voice barely above a whisper. “But I can’t go through with this. Not like this.”
“Let me tell you something, son. Dozens of people have died because of the war between the Callahans and the Orsinis,” he said. “You remember your Uncle Arthur? Yeah, Gabe Orsini shot him down while he was leaving the pharmacy. His wife and kid were in the car.”
“Gabe--that was Adriana’s uncle, right?” I asked. “Like, her dad’s brother, not Uncle like your friend Uncle Arthur?”
He glared at me. “Lad, if you don’t understand that our family is, well, family, you’re never going to be able to run things.” My father leaned forward, his voice taking on a softer tone. “I know you might not want to be used to this kind of life, Tristan. But you were born into it. You’ve been raised to be a leader, to protect our family at all costs. Even if that means making difficult choices.”
“I know,” I said, my voice shaking. “But...I can’t just do this blindly. She’s not some pawn in this game, Dad.”
“Is she worth more than our family’s safety and reputation?” he asked, his eyes intense.
“No, it’s not that,” I said quickly. “It’s just that...I want to do this the right way. I want to at least try to make it work between us.”
“So try to win her over after you’re married,” he said. “Not before.”
I rubbed my temple, my head throbbing. “I can’t.”
“Fine,” he said, grabbing his phone from his pocket. “Keep the war going. Fuck around with Silvio Orsini and his daughter. You do whatever you want to do.”
