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She laughs. “Chocolate for me,” she answers.
I smile at her. Delighted by her delight.
“Alright, two grasshoppers and a chocolate coming up,” the server says, not pulling her eyes up from the notepad before flouncing off.
She returns faster than we know what to do with. Leo isn’t thrilled with his grasshopper and I’m disappointed I steered him wrong. That’s when Isabella comes in, supermom to the rescue, sliding her untouched chocolate shake to Leo. “Trade?”
Leo grins at her and slides the glasses so he can tackle the chocolate.
I stop sipping my shake and watch her as she takes a sip of her shake. An inch is already missing and the whipped cream is a mess from Leo dipping his finger into it. But she seems unfazed. Content. It’s silly to call something like that a sacrifice, but it is, isn’t it?
Isabella’s spent all these years putting Leo first.
No one’s been putting her first. And while I might still have a lot of work to do with getting to know my son, I know Isabella. Fuck that it was only a month. We made a life in that month. Learned each other mentally, physically and spiritually. I’ve dated since then. Had girlfriends. None of those connections have ever come close to what I had with Isabella.
I would be a fool to lose that again.
Leo chugs his shake and I mean chugs. Marisol and Isabella both fuss over him to slow down, but he is in heaven. By the end, there’s chocolate on the corners of his mouth and his eyes are vibrating with a sugar high. His body bounces as he kicks his legs. He clips my shins a couple of times with the front of his shoe unknowingly. It doesn’t hurt. It’s not even mildly annoying.
“Can we go to the park before we go home, Mama?” Leo asks.
Isabella glances out the window. The world is deep into sunset. “Sure we can. But Rex and I still have milkshakes to drink.”
“Okayyyy…” Leo moans, tipping his head back, body elongating and going stiff as a board.
Isabella looks at Marisol tiredly.
“I said it was too much sugar,” Marisol quips.
“Don’t start with the ‘I told you so’,” Isabella says, concentrating on mixing her shake with the striped straw.
“I don’t have to. You know I’m always right. Right about milkshakes, right about the school, right about –” Marisol stops and gestures a hand toward me.
I smile though I’m confused. “Right about me?”
Marisol engulfs my bicep with both her small hands. “That you would be sweet on Leo! I always told Isabella, ‘Call him. Tell him. He’ll be happy.’ Did she listen? No, of course she didn’t because –“
Isabella flushes. “Mama, not in front of Leo. And not…” Her eyes flick around the restaurant. “Not here, please.”
“Tell you what,” Marisol says, extending a finger into the air. “I will take Leo to the park and you –“
“Yay!” Leo erupts in excitement, jumping out of the booth and stretching his body long so his dress shirt lifts and reveals a strip of his belly. His skin looks so soft and still round, like a baby.
I am filled with wistfulness for a time I never experienced, back when he was just a baby. Before he could remember what life was like without me. But in a way, he is still a baby. I can make up for lost time. I know I can.
“And you two can spend some time together and catch up,” Marisol says and shoos me out of the booth.
“Oh, Mama, no that’s not necessary,” Isabella tries to interject.
I help Marisol out of the booth until she’s on her feet. Not much taller than when she’s sitting. She smooths out the wrinkles in her dress. “You two had a stressful day and need some time to… unwind.”
I raise my eyebrows. No way Marisol is hinting at –
“I wanted Rex to come,” Leo says with a sad poke of his lower lip.
My heart breaks. I squat down to eye level with him. “Next time we’ll go to the park together. Does that sound okay?”
Leo’s forehead wrinkles in the same places Isabella’s does. “When?”
