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Anyway, we follow the same routine we did five years ago. Park on the gravel shoulder meant for people having car trouble and take the short walk out to the rocky outcropping that makes a half-moon shape, offering an unusual cage of privacy.
As a teen, my friends and I would come camping out here. It’s not a legal campground which is why the rocks are so helpful for concealment for building tents, tending fires…
And other activities.
Rex follows me, just as he did five years ago. A California boy, but not a desert boy. He was freaked out by the lack of streetlamps and the distant call of coyotes. I had to assure him they would never be interested in him since there was no meat on his bones.
This time, though, he walks behind me with a bit more confidence. I am the one shaking with nerves.
What am I doing inviting him out here to this spot where more often than not, we’d end up coiling our bodies together, pleasuring each other until it got too cold?
I am a sensible person. I think most people would describe me that way. But Rex makes me lose brain cells. He has since we met. I wasn’t the type for one-night stands, wasn’t the type to indulge a man’s fantasies of falling headfirst into an affair, and certainly wasn’t the type to introduce a man to my mother after only two weeks.
This is what I was afraid of when I saw him on the gurney in my ER. That I’d get sucked right back in. Deeper this time. Because of Leo.
We share a child together and that unites people in a way that isn’t like anything else.
It’s not just my body craving him. My life craves him too.
When we reach the outcropping, we spread a blanket out across the ground, chuckling when it doesn’t billow into the air, but twists and flops into the dirt.
Eventually, we get it right and both sit on the blanket, looking out at the expanse of the desert and the runny orange yolk of the sun as it begins to set.
“This is much better,” Rex says, tucking his knees up to his chest and laying his long arms over his knees. “No people.”
I laugh. “You love people.”
He shakes his head. “Used to. I mean, don’t get me wrong, people are what have made me. The fans. The people behind the scenes. But there’s a tipping point that once you get past it, no one fucking leaves you alone. Sometimes I’d like to disappear.”
“That’s… crazy,” I say. “I mean, you just seem so good at the whole rockstar thing. So comfortable in the spotlight.”
Rex grins. “You keep an eye on me?”
I choke out a syllable. “Uh – hard to avoid when you end up on the cover of People from time to time.”
Rex’s lips perk up. “You’re so full of shit.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
“Am not!” I retort and shove him on the shoulder.
Rex wobbles to the side with a laugh and captures my hand against his shoulder before I can withdraw it.
I look from my hand to his green eyes. An oasis in the desert. With our eyes locked, he draws my hand to his mouth and kisses each of my knuckles tenderly.
I know I should draw away. But I can’t. “Rex, what am I going to do with you?” I ask.
“I have ideas,” Rex offers. “Come here.” His other hand grabs my upper arm and pulls me closer to him, so our sides are pressed together. Rex drops his mouth to my ear. “Don’t be so far away.”
Slowly, I turn my face toward his. “We’re supposed to be catching up as old friends…”
His nose brushes mine, eyes pinned to my lips. “How would you like to do that, Isabella?”
We should talk. We should… discuss. Or something. I don’t know.
What I do know is his hand is hot against mine. And I want his hand hot elsewhere. “Here,” I say, then pull away enough so that he can view me better. I grip the hem of my shirt and move it up my torso just enough so he can see my right side.
