AllFreeNovel
Share Us
"I honestly don't know what to do," I said. I mean, if we were at home, I would know, but I didn't know this hospital, I didn't know their equipment, I didn't even know who to talk to.
"Please, doctor. May I help?" Khadija stood in front of me.
I shrugged. "I would love for you to help. Do you know anywhere where we can locate a replacement? This is such a freak accident, but we can't put the patient's life in danger." She nodded.
"I will run and ask around. How much time do I have, sir?" she asked, concerned.
I looked at the patient. "I think about half an hour and then we should bring the patient out of sedation. Their small bodies have higher risks when we are adding so much to their systems."
She nodded and left right away.
Karen and I looked at each other. There wasn't anything we could do but wait.
Part of me was growing angry, but the other part was trying to talk that part out of it. The angry part wanted someone to pay for this oversight, and the other part knew that sometimes shit happens and you have to go with the flow.
Give up control, Dom.
Why does this keep flying in my face? It was getting tiring.
One thing for sure was that it was something I needed to work on.
Twenty-two minutes after she left, Khadija came running back. She had found a fully sterilized endoscope! The whole room jumped back into action, knowing our places and what was at stake.
See, Dom? Everything works out. And in beautiful ways.
There wasn't much more to report. The rest of the surgeries went without a hitch. I learned more, Karen learned more, and our local attending team learned more. Lives were saved, although a substantial amount of aftercare and rehabilitation would be required for some of these patients.
Karen and I were exhausted every day, but knowing our motivation for being there made it easy to work up our energy when we had to. I was so thankful she was there. Someone to bounce ideas off of, to share in the experience. Some experiences don't have words.
The small gentleman with the gold tooth never really appeared again. I saw him at Abdi's bedside, following surgery. Being there when Abdi's mother couldn't be. If this was the leader of the rebel group, I couldn't tell. He seemed like a totally normal guy to me.
Besides, doctors don't get involved with politics or beliefs. It's our duty to help everyone, no matter who they are or whether we might like them or agree with their lifestyles. All that fades when someone physically needs help. So I try to keep my mind off of those things.
What I couldn't keep my mind off of, though, was Calla.
Being there with Karen made me realize how I just wanted someone to be there with me, witnessing the same things so we could build memories together. I have to admit that Calla has been the only one in my life I could ever envision that with.
But maybe I had screwed that up now. No. Correction. I HAD screwed that up now. As much as I knew that it was the best thing for this situation, part of me just wanted her to be there with me. In this case, it wasn't possible. Karen had the expertise, of course, and I would never ask Calla to come here. But wanting her there just proved to me I think I wanted her there for the rest of my life.
There by my side. And me by hers.
It became clearer to me that what I had done wasn't, in fact, the best thing for me.
And that was a difficult revelation for me. That I couldn't and I shouldn't try to control everything. That I couldn't and shouldn't try to decide what was best for other people. That who I loved couldn't be decided by a list of pros and cons.
Fuck me. What had I done? A huge feeling of unrest came over me, and I was glad we were at the end of our work here. I needed to get home to sort things out.
I only prayed that I wasn't too late.
Chapter 32
Calla
Isat looking out the kitchen window, but not seeing anything. All I could see was Dom. All I could smell was Dom. All I didn't have in my life that I wanted was Dom.
"Fuck," I said, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand. "I can't keep doing this." I pulled out my phone, hesitating for a moment before dialing my mother's number. If there was anyone who might understand what I was going through, it was her.
"Hey, Mom," I said when she picked up, trying to keep my voice steady. "I... I need to talk to you about something."
