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"And what's that?" Aza pointed to the orphaned weapon belt on her cot.
"I'm supposed to wear it too." I looked at her questioningly. "Will you help me put it on?"
"I'm sorry, Myrina. I can't help you with that. I've never worn a belt like this before." She looked at me with a smirk. "You'll have to ask Lucifer for help."
CHAPTER 8
Furious, I stormed up the stairs to the second floor. This arrogant god must have done it on purpose. My jaws were grinding so hard I was afraid my teeth wouldn't be able to withstand the pressure.
I reached the door to his study quicker than expected. The weapon belt dangled in my hand. Despite Aza's advice to ask Tanael to put it on me, I had, of course, tried it myself first. But after it still didn't fit from front to back the third time I put it on, I had to admit defeat.
Everything in me bristled at the thought of asking him for it. It wasn't because I refused to accept his help—no, it wasn't because of that at all. Even though I couldn't stand him, I wasn't too good to ask him.
It was more that my defensiveness had to do with the inevitable proximity of our bodies, which had already been our undoing in other situations.
Without knocking, I stormed into the room and froze in mid-motion.
Tanael was standing by the fireplace with his back to me. He was leaning on the mantelpiece with his hands, his head hanging almost exhausted between his arms. But I couldn't take my eyes off the mighty wings rising from his shoulder blades. They were snow-white, with tips that seemed to drip liquid gold. Gold, just as warm and graceful as his irises.
I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life. Hot and unstoppable tears of happiness ran down my face. My heart was almost bursting with exhilarating emotions—it felt like I was experiencing them all simultaneously. So, this must have been what happened to the people in the biblical stories who had met an angel.
Even though Tanael's attitude was one of deep despair, his whole being radiated power and a never-ending strength.
I simply had to touch it, had to run my fingers over its golden tips at least once. Before I could stop myself, I was already standing right behind the angel, reaching to touch his wings. As if in a trance, I felt magically drawn to them.
My finger gently stroked one of the feathers. As soon as my skin brushed against the wing, a tingling warmth slid into my body and wound its way through my veins like little electrifying jolts.
But then a burning pain shot into my wrist, and hard caramel stared back at me. A storm raged in his eyes. He gripped my arm so tightly that I let out a whimper. Startled, he looked down at his tight grip, which he loosened but didn't let go of me. He took a step closer.
"Never touch my wings again," he growled. "Do you understand that?"
I could feel the green in my irises turning cold too. Furious at his outburst, I stared back.
"No need to act like a gorilla," I hissed and snatched my wrist from him. I rubbed it furtively as I glanced behind Tanael. His wings had disappeared. I would have loved to see them once again, but my disappointment that he wanted to hide them from me fueled my anger at him again.
I energetically held the weapon belt under his nose.
"How should I put it on?" I said to him more harshly than I intended.
Tanael raised an eyebrow in surprise. His face softened as he took the belt from my hand with a sigh.
"I'm sorry about what I said," he mumbled. "I was in thought, I didn't hear you and ..."
He looked at me again. Thoughtfulness, almost as if he was wrestling with himself, crossed his eyes.
"It's been a long time since anyone touched my wings. They are very ... sensitive."
"I shouldn't have touched them," I admitted, embarrassed by his honesty. "I apologize for that."
He nodded silently. His gaze intensified, and without me being able to stop it, his golden irises devoured me. I nervously stepped from one foot to the other and kneaded my hands.
"Now, will you show me how to put on this monster?" I pointed to the belt and hoped fervently that I could break eye contact before I was utterly lost.
"Yes, of course." Was that also nervousness I could detect in his voice? Could anything make a god nervous?
"May I?" He pointed to my legs with his free hand. Without really looking at him, I nodded. I would have liked to close my eyes, hold my breath, and sing to myself so I couldn't concentrate on what was about to happen.
But Tanael was already kneeling before me and spreading his weapon belt out on the carpet.
