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I let out a startled cry when I saw someone sitting in the armchair in the room's opposite corner. Tanael.
I hastily tried to cover my naked upper body with my hands while glaring at him. Luckily, I was wearing underpants, so I only had to concentrate on my breasts.
"What makes you think you can sneak into my room like that?" I snapped at him.
"Your room? If I remember correctly, I assigned this one to Aspasia. You didn't want a bedroom, remember?" he teased me, which made me hate him even more. This room thing was starting to become a real problem.
"And don't bother hiding anything from me. I've already seen it anyway." His irises flared gold. "Everything."
When is that supposed to have happened? I would remember that. Or would I? I looked at him uncertainly. Like a wolf watching the lamb, waiting to strike at any moment, he tilted his head.
An image flickered before my inner eye and slowly became sharper. Tanael and I, naked in my darkness, in my dream.
"Oh," I said quietly as the feelings from back then threatened to catch up with me.
The image blurred slightly, rippling until a new one emerged. I saw myself lying on my bed in New York City. Naked, writhing, torn apart by arousal that had almost driven me mad after my dream of Paris. That had been the moment when I had given in to my lust because I couldn't take it anymore. I remembered the feeling of someone in the room with me, the body's weight on mine, a tongue and hands that finally released me.
My eyes darted over to him.
"Was that you back then?" I shouted.
"Yes, that was me. Seeing how much you suffered," he defended himself as he stood and walked towards me.
I remembered the constantly open windows in my bedroom.
"Have you visited me often?" I hissed. My anger was mixed with disappointment. He had been secretly watching me.
"I did because I wanted to protect you," Tanael admitted honestly. He remained calm and came closer and closer.
"You were secretly watching me!" I shouted out loud. And gave me what I needed at that moment, I thought quietly. It had felt right. I had begged for redemption, and he had heard me.
My anger became less and less. Instead, sadness overcame me like a surprising flood that swept me away. The loneliness had almost killed me at that time. And only now did I realize I had never been alone. He had been with me the whole time. He had protected me, held me. Watched over my sleep at night.
Tanael was now standing right in front of me. My arms sagged. He gently wiped a tear from my cheek.
"I have never left you alone, and I never will. I will always be near you and watch over you," he whispered, pulling me into a hug. His promise penetrated deep into my heart as I cuddled up to him, crying. My body trembled until Tanael's warmth settled over me like a blanket.
He tenderly stroked my hair and the bare skin on my back while I shed all the tears that carried the memory of the loneliness I felt.
As soon as the last tear had been shed and I had regained my composure, he broke away from me and turned around.
"Get dressed quickly. Otherwise, I can't guarantee anything. And then I'll help you with the weapon belt." His voice sounded gentle and yet rough with lust.
What was this strange relationship we had? We were neither completely friends nor enemies, even though I tried to convince myself we were. We desired each other, and as soon as I thought about him, feelings I hadn't known before and couldn't place flooded my body and soul. Was it love? But at the same time, we couldn't be together. It wasn't my mind telling me this, but my heart, which was almost bursting with longing for him. Did he feel the same for me? I would be careful not to ask him, but I couldn't suppress the question.
I hastily slipped into the dark clothes after tying my breasts with a cloth. Finally, I put on my boots.
"Done," I announced.
He breathed a sigh of relief and turned to me. In his hands, he now held the unruly belt I was familiar with.
The angel laid it on the floor before my feet without looking at me.
"Get into the loops, please," he instructed me.
As soon as I had done so, he lifted the belt up to my hips, just like last time. While he fastened the various hooks, he didn't touch me once.
When he had finished, he walked to the door, and I quickly hid the weapon belt under my shirt.
