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“Would the two of you afford me your hands?”
Afford me your hands? Why was I talking like that? I didn’t know, but maybe it was all the stuffy nobles rubbing off on me.
Gross.
“Of course, dear,” the lady said, tittering lightly. “Goodness, holding hands with a beautiful young soldier. Normally, this would mean I was getting fresh.”
“Take it easy, Maelynndia. Not everyone is used to Tuatha humor.” Lord Faulztus looked to me and waggled his eyebrows. “My sweet and polite dear has imbibed perhaps one too many libations this evening.”
“How else am I supposed to tolerate all these eyes on me? Makes me feel like an animal in a zoo.”
I agreed with that. The nobles were not shy about staring. and it made me feel better that it wasn’t just us in Kai’s entourage who were being ogled.
With that, she offered her hand, and her husband followed suit, allowing me to intertwine our fingers. I was sure at least a few people had to be watching and thinking we were either crazy or getting fresh with each other, but I didn’t care. I was so thrilled about learning a new species of cryptid that every staring noble could kick rocks.
My magic coursed through them, fizzing and green. It was the first time I’d allowed myself to use it since interacting directly with my curse, and I could feel that my energy was hesitant, like it wasn’t sure it was allowed to be out.
Technically, I supposed it shouldn’t be, that I absolutely should be keeping a tight rein on it, but I couldn’t pass up on such an opportunity. I could feel my healing mapping out the two Tuatha in front of me at rapid pace, logging things my conscious mind couldn’t even catch and would have to be sorted out later in my sleep.
It only took a minute, two at most, but the rush I felt when I finally let go of their hands was palpable. Finally, I was back in my element. It felt so good to do something healing related without one of my friends being in peril.
“Thank you,” I said, straightening. “I really do appreciate it.”
“We appreciate you. You’ve given us quite a story to tell back home. Now, if you don’t mind us, I see a roasted pig that has our name on it.”
The two bowed and curtseyed to me before heading off. I turned toward my friends, ready to gush, only for my gaze to snag on a figure all the way on the other side of the room. Pausing for just a moment, I realized that it was the queen herself, glowering at me like I’d done something wrong.
Well, that was uncomfortable.
Quickly averting my gaze and hoping she didn’t notice that I’d noticed her, I stepped forward and looped my arm through Aodin’s.
He looked over but never broke the conversation he’d sunken into with Darla and a middle-aged woman I didn’t recognize, which worked fine with me. I just wanted to stand and observe for a little while.
That kept up for several hours, with us only taking breaks to eat, though when we ate, we ate, including insanely rich things that topped even the fare they served in the dining room. There were pheasant eggs with lobster stuffing, glazed venison with all sorts of mint jellies and other fancy fixings. Roasted boar. Crab. Fruits and vegetables I’d never seen. Baked goods that looked like something out of a wedding movie, and some I didn’t even have names for.
So, yes, I was eating my feelings a little, or I was just enjoying the broad range of the spread. Either way, it was when my stomach was full, and I was leaning back on a chaise in the sitting area that I noticed the ball was finally beginning to wind down. Thank the gods because I was exhausted.
I looked around for Kai, hoping I’d be able to see him, but he’d been pretty scarce for a while now. I’d been able to keep him in my peripheral vision when he’d been dancing with his sister, which was about the sweetest thing I ever saw, but then his mother had whisked him away, and any glances of him after that were fleeting.
I hated that he was so at the whims of his family. He couldn’t even enjoy a party that was ostensibly for him. Royalty sure seemed to suck for being something that everyone was supposed to want.
It was only after a long, long scan of the ballroom that I saw him speaking to a couple of nobles. Dipping into our bond, I felt intense boredom and weariness, but instead of being comforted by our shared irritation, I just felt bad for him.
Strangely enough, however, Felicity was nowhere to be seen. Odd. I had steeled myself for the two of them to be glued together all night. Had something happened? I wanted to ask Kai, but I knew I couldn’t, and that began to rapidly eat away at my nerves.
I managed to last another half hour, but it began to feel like I needed to rip my skin off my body and run around like a wolf to be sane, so I figured it was the proper time to dip. About a third of the crowd had already exited, including the lovely couple that let me read them, so I figured it was fine for me to slip away, too.
I gave Darla and Aodin my leave, and with both wishing to stay longer, I returned to my quarter spent. I was so exhausted, in fact, that I flopped on my bed without changing out of my cumbersome dress or taking out my ornate hair pieces. Was it comfortable? Not at all. But I’d made the choice and was most certainly dealing with it.
But as I laid there, reveling in the silence and the fact that nobody was looking at me or sizing me up, I did wish I’d gotten to dance at least once with Kai. I liked to think I was a realistic woman, but I had hoped for a tiny taste of that fae tale moment. Just he and I, in each other’s arms, floating across the floor while music enveloped us.
Did I know how to dance? No, not really. But I’d still hoped.
Which was silly and embarrassing. Even if that’d been a possibility for us, I’d seen that Kai was an experienced dancer who evidently knew what he was doing. I’d end up stepping on his feet more often than not.
At least I always had my imagination. So, despite my pride, I let my eyes close, ignored all the fancy pins pricking me, and let my mind drift to what it’d be like if we could, indeed, have that moment.
I couldn’t say how long I drifted like that, lost in a fantasy I normally would never allow myself. But my breathing was steady, and my body was as relaxed as I could be in my get-up when someone knocked quietly on the door.
