AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Okay, Mia. I’m going to see Ma.
I stare across the street, grinding my teeth, thinking of all the darkness and sickness in the world. It started the first time I heard my ma whimpering in pain. I was just a kid. What the hell was I supposed to do? I kept hearing it over the years. Then I told him once, told him to stop, and he thought he was tough, coming at me and beating up a kid.
So I snapped. I saw murder and at the end…
Am I sick? For feeling powerful? For feeling in the right, for once?
Say hi from me if you can.
I can say hi from “Amelia.” That’s the name I gave her. I hope that’s okay.
I blink and rub my eyes. My thoughts keep dragging toward the past. It’s like Mia has unlocked me. It’s not just a joke. Do I really think pain can make the world a better place? But love seemed like a joke before. Mia.Love?
Amelia… Sure, I like it… for now.
I have to push the car door open and walk onto the street. I lean against the car, facing away from the lodging house, wiping the sweat from my head. Somebody hurt her. My Mia. My woman. Somebodyhurther.
“Are you okay, mister?”
I turn to find a little boy standing there. Maybe he’s around eight or nine or ten, wearing a T-shirt with a superhero on it. His mom has her back turned, unloading groceries into the car.
“Jimmy, leave him alone.” The lady looks at me. “Sorry.”
Something about it almost makes me crack up. For a split second, I imagine that the kid is mine. I’ve got a child, and I’m a father. Mia and I have made something beautiful and innocent. Then, somehow, in some way, the world would make us pay for it—a hammer to the head with twisted-up feelings.
“It’s fine,” I say, making my tone calm.
The woman smiles tightly, and the kid keeps staring. There’s no judgment there, just curiosity.
This dinner will have to wait, but you deserve a date. I’ll take you someplace in secret. This war can’t stop us.
Isn’t it too risky? What if Leo finds out? What about your ma?
Guilt touches me, but I can’t lie to her.You’re worth the risks.
I don’t think I can let you do that,she replies.I saw how badly you wanted to hurt Dad. You stopped yourself, and I bet I know why—your mom.
If she weren’t so sick and had somebody else to take care of her, I would have done it,I tell her. She’s hit it on the truth so hard.Then I would’ve lost you, too.
What happens after the war?she texts.
I know what she’s asking. About our future. A relationship, whatever that means. What if we did have kids one day? Would we sit them down and explain about the time Daddy kidnapped Mommy and plotted to kill their grandpappy?
I don’t know,I reply, feeling a little pathetic like I should say more, but I can’t.
I have to go. Talk later?
Sure. See you, Mia.
She’s doing the right thing, turning down the meeting. She’s helping Ma. I still can’t fight the itch, the urge to be close to my woman, hold her, own her. For how long? Why?
I return to the car, drum my fingers on the steering wheel, and stare across the street. A big part of this job is waiting and waiting.
CHAPTER 19
Mia
Lexi sits at the window with David in her arms, rocking him gently. She’s got this warm, love-filled glow to her cheeks every time she glances down at him. It tugs at something in me, but I ignore it. I don’t want to think about the future.
