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"And we still weren't making enough to be comfortable." She kept smoking, too relaxed for someone who didn't grow up in this life. "Take the wins when you can."
Just then, my phone began to ring. My father's name appeared. We'd been playing phone tag all week from the time difference with only a short answer so far, but I knew he'd be just waking up right now. We were late evening right before dinner time, and he was an early riser. Showing my phone to her, she waved me away to have a moment with my old man.
"Hey, Dad!" I breathed, waiting to hear the sound of his voice. It wasn't like us to normally go on this long without talking.
"Oh, honey." An ease settled into his tone. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine, Dad. I just needed a break, like I told you last time we talked."
"I'm glad you're having fun, and I know you're safe. Now, I have to ask. What were you thinking? Did you just up and leave work too?" Like a true father, he worried first them reprimanded my behavior. Hearing it felt like the most normal thing, and it helped my overworking mind calm down.
"I wasn't, if you want the truth. It was almost like I'd been home one day and woke up in paradise the next." Not a complete lie, but I knew he didn't want to hear about me being manhandled by a kidnapper.
"And when do you plan on returning?"
"We didn't set a date to come back. Right now, Kasey and I are living and trying to be happy. You should want me to travel this journey for myself because I was really lost, Dad."
After a moment of silence, I could practically hear what he really wanted to say to me. I hated disappointing him.
"I'm also still working. I'm just running groups online through zoom instead. I do some individual counseling too, so it's been a nice change."
"At least you're being smart about that." He'd been worried about me financially forever, so I couldn't imagine how he felt right now.
"Yeah, after I ended things with Tim, I needed something new. Now that I've been here for a bit, I can see what I hadn't been while home. I'm happy, so I hope you can be for me."
"Of course, I want you happy. I just wish you planned a little better to not stress me out this much. I've been worried sick when you don’t answer, Emilia." He didn't get aggressive, but he let me know how this made him suffer. "Will you please keep me in the loop for the rest of your trip?"
"I will, Daddy. I'm sorry I made you worry." Now that I stood inside the manor, I kept my voice quieter to not let anyone overhear me. My eyes swung around to see all the guards near me. With too many to count, I went for the stairs to have some privacy. Of course, once I found my quiet place, my father let me know he had to clock in for work and expected texts to keep him up to date on my travels. Reminding me for pictures, I promised to send them when I took them, but I hadn’t been out much.
Standing in the empty hall, I patted the back of my phone against my open palm. I hadn't taken any pictures yet, but I had been sleeping around. Could I say that to my dad, though? Guilt ate at me when I didn't deliver the full truth. He'd raised me to always say the truth even if it condemned a punishment. Hurrying to shoot off a text, I mentioned meeting some wonderful people and how I felt about maybe pursuing a new dating life.
"Everything okay?" Antonio called me out of my mindfuck.
Gasping, I clutched my phone to my chest like I'd been doing something illegal. "Oh, it's only you. Sorry, my dad called."
"Did it not go okay?" His concern read boldly on his troubled features.
"As well as any dad would take their child up and vanishing," I snorted.
"Ah, that must be a typical thing for people like you, but it's not in our life. My father never asks where I am or even notices how long I've been gone."
"Did it happen with adulthood?" I knew I didn't want to hear the answer.
"I love how sweet you are in the belief people deserve good, but boys who grow into men like me aren't afforded those reckless thoughts."
"I'm so sorry." Sometimes, without intending to, I said something hurtful and insensitive because I didn't understand. My mind needed to start remembering they were more like the children I worked with and less like the ones I went to school with.
"Don't be. I wouldn't be who I am today without all the baggage I have to carry because of it. Hell, I wouldn't learn what true love is without it."
"I could see that." Nodding my head, I thought of my best friend. "If I hadn't seen Kasey's home life firsthand, I'd struggle to understand how others suffered like her."
His eyes took me in like I could bridge the gap between his trauma to his happiness, and I wanted to be that more than anything for him. Our longing look caused us to remain still for longer than we should've been. He cleared his throat awkwardly, taking his needing soul with it. "I have something to show you. I was trying to finish it while you were with Draven."
Even though I knew they both wanted me, I felt this embarrassing sting when he mentioned knowing about our library activities. He saw the surprise and slapped his forehead.
"Sorry, that was insensitive of me. Draven and I don't keep anything from each other to make sure our relationship stays healthy and open. Dating us means the other knowing about those bits."
"I agree with them. I was just unprepared to hear you say it, I guess?"
