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“How are you doing, man?”
My throat tightens and my eyes water. Cade knows better than anyone about the loss of my wife. They went to high school together. Losing her has left a void in my life and Cade can tell.
“I’m...okay,” I say after a long pause. “I’m still not sure if I’ll ever be able to move on from this. Laura literally takes over my dreams every night.”
“I know it’s hard, but she wouldn’t want you to be sitting around like this. She would want you out here living your life and being happy.”
I need to live again, but how? It’s so much easier said than done.
“Maybe you could start with something small,” Cade suggests. “Sign up for a dating app or something. When’s the last time you were with a woman?”
“Why does it matter?”
Cade looks at me with an understanding expression and takes a sip of his drink. “It’s understandable that you’re not ready to move on, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have needs and desires that need to be taken care of.” He sets his drink down and leans forward, his voice taking on a serious tone. “You could find a woman who’s willing to just have sex with you and leave it at that. It doesn’t have to be a relationship.”
I frown and look away. That’s not what I want. I don’t want to just be with someone for physical pleasure. I want something deeper, someone I can connect with on a more intimate level.
“Look,” Cade continues, “it doesn’t have to be anything serious. It could be a one-night stand or something casual. There are plenty of women out there who just want to have some fun and don’t want anything serious. You just need to know where to look.”
I think about it for a moment. Maybe he’s right. Bars, clubs, online dating sites, even at the grocery store. But then I think about the kind of woman I want to spend my time with. Someone I can share my thoughts and feelings with. I don’t want to just have a meaningless physical encounter.
“The thing is,” I say, “I want something more than just sex. I want a connection. I want to feel something real. Like what I had with Laura.”
Cade nods. “I get it. But you don’t have to go looking for something serious right away. Why not go out and have some fun? You never know, you might meet someone special.”
“Alright,” I say, “I’ll give it a try.”
Cade smiles and pats me on the shoulder. “That’s the spirit. Go out there and have some fun. You never know what might happen.”
One step at a time.
“I heard your sister is getting married. That was a shock. Remember when we used to give her a hard time that she was going to be single forever... it’s all because of the attitude, though. Glad she found someone who could overlook it.”
Cade and my sister dated once upon a time for like a week, and it did not end well. She didn’t want to listen to me when I said that they aren’t the same type of person, but she can be rebellious.
“Yeah, it’s tomorrow. She is still giving me a hard time about being single. My family just won’t give up. How does my love life affect them?”
“I think it’s more they just want to see you happy. You can’t blame them for that.”
“Yeah, I’m taking my assistant. She gonna pretend to be my girlfriend so they will leave me the fuck alone.”
“Is she hot?” he asks.
I will not grace that with an answer and get myself in trouble. Even though I’m not ready to move on, I have eyes. Willow is attractive, and sometimes I remind myself that I’m at work when she is around.
“Let me see what she looks like.”
I bring up my phone and type her in. When I turn it around to show Cade, his jaw drops to the floor. “No fucking way you are going to take this girl to a wedding and not end up in bed... girls are always horny after and, by the looks of it, she’s probably great in the sack.”
Hearing him talk about her like this makes me tense. I don’t want to think about how she might be in bed because I have to work with her closely. I don’t need images of her ass bouncing on my cock and her fingernails digging into my back as she screams for more. That wouldn’t be professional of me.
8
Willow
Monica comes to my door, her arms full of bags and a makeup case tucked under one arm. She steps inside, her high heel shoes clicking on the hardwood floor.
“Hey there,” she says with a smile, setting her bags and makeup case on the entry table.
