Page 28 of F*ck My Luck


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“Cut it with the sappy dramatics. You two have done me a favor. All I ask is that you take care of Bethany. She’s one of the good ones.”

“I will devote my life to making Bethany happy,” I promise, gazing at my whirlwind full of excitement for the beautiful future we’re going to build together.

“You better, because I was a mean old bitch before, and now I’ve got magical powers, so will burst your dick into flames if you hurt her.”

I start to laugh, assuming she likes to add humor to every situation like Bethany, but the severe look on her face makes it apparent she is not joking.

“I will never hurt her,” I swear solemnly.

“Good,” says Nancy, nodding her green head with satisfaction at my response. “Now you’ve caught me in a generous mood, and I’d like to test out my magic before Mr. Binx and I go off-grid. Zeno, it’s your lucky day. I’m going to grant you three wishes, so hit me with them.”

My mouth falls open. I had never considered Nancy granting me wishes once the transfer was made.

I stroke my hand down my beard, pondering what to select now I can wish for anything my heart desires, but then my eyes settle on Bethany, and I realize that no wish in the world can compare to her.

“I am greatly honored by your offer, Nancy, but I have no requirements. I have the love of my life. I do not need for anything more,” I say, cupping Bethany’s face while my heart overflows with emotion.

“Oh Zeno, that’s adorable,” says Bethany, pressing her hand gently over mine.

“But?” I ask, knowing my gorgeous whirlwind too well by now to think she’s got nothing more to say.

“But do you know what would be even better than being madly in love? Being filthy rich and madly in love. Now get wishing, babe.”

THE END

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