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“And as far as what he’ll expect for sex, well, that’s sort of an individual preference or a decision you make together. There are different sexual positions.”
“How many?”
“Several.”
“Could you describe them, please?”
“Okay. Well, his…penis may enter you when he’s on top of you, or behind you. You could be on top of him. Whatever feels good. And there are other types of sex that doesn’t involve his penis penetrating you.”
“Oh?”
“Hands or fingers touching those areas can feel good for men and women. As well as, um, mouths.”
“Mouths?” Yuck. “Never mind.” Who would put their mouth on someone else’s private parts? I don’t ask that question in case I’m weird for not wanting to do that. “So, sex is over when the man’s semen is released?”
“Uh-huh.” Vanessa takes a big gulp of her glass of water. “Most people call that an orgasm or ‘coming.’ The slang term of the substance itself is usually called cum, C-U-M.”
“Okay. When he finishes coming, the sex is over? How long does it take for that to happen? What do I do during it? Just lie there?”
“So, let’s back up a bit. A man isn’t the only one who can have an orgasm during sex. Women can too. In fact, your…pleasure should be his priority every time.”
“My pleasure? So, it doesn’t hurt every time?”
“No, definitely not. It can feel good for women too.”
“That’s a relief.”
“And sex is over whenever you both either come or you decide to stop. Your body will know what to do during the act to increase the pleasure.”
“It will?”
“Yes. You just do what feels good.”
“Okay. And afterward?”
“After sex you’ll hopefully, um, cuddle.”
“Cuddle?”
“Yes. That’s when you just enjoy each other’s company, the intimacy and closeness. After sex, if you have an orgasm, your body is filled with happy endorphins that make you feel good and relaxed.”
“Oh,” I say, wondering what that’s like, the intimacy with someone else. I get plenty of happy endorphins from tennis, though. “But like, what if I’m bad at it?”
“You can’t be bad at cuddling.”
“No, I mean the sex part. Lochlan has probably been with tons of women. He’s going to have so much experience while I have zero. I’ve never even seen a naked man before.”
Vanessa nods. “I can understand why being with him could be intimidating, but you shouldn’t be self-conscious about sex. You’ll learn as you go, and believe it or not, some men are very turned on by virgins.”
I recall vividly that Lochlan demanded I lose my virginity to him.
“Why?”
“They like to be the first to, well, you know, go there.”
Oh, yeah, I’m pretty sure Lochlan is one of those men. But, after the first time, if he’s the one who takes my virginity, then what? Will he lose interest in me?
“Also,” Vanessa adds, “if he has so much experience, then hopefully that will make him a good lover. Let him show you a good time and teach you what he likes. If you ask, I bet he would love to tell you.”
