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He nodded gravely and I noticed he still had the cookie jar. Mallory hadn’t thought to grab it. Pulling out a cookie, he offered me one and then quickly hid the jar behind my back when Mallory strolled by. “Aunt Mal is a bully about the cookies. I have to steal them or she won’t share them with me.”
I shoved the entire cookie in my mouth, letting the sugar cheer me up momentarily. “That makes sense. It’s a good cookie. I’d probably steal it from your Aunt Mal, too.”
We sat there in silence, both of us eating his stolen cookies until the jar was empty and the crumbs were long since dusted off on our legs. We glanced at each other every so often, but Avery seemed happy to just copy whatever pose I was in. When Mallory walked by, we both averted our eyes from her.
Finally, I looked down at Avery and shrugged. “Do you like living here?”
He shrugged. “I like that Mom lets me play in the yard now. And Mom is here with me more. She was always riding the bus before and it was so slow. When I had to ride the bus with her, I hated it. I liked when Aunt Mal picked me up in her car. Even though it smells like butt.”
I let out an unexpected laugh. “It smells like butt?”
He nodded and let out a grave sounding sigh. “Yeah. She said it smells like hippy and one day I’d like it.”
Mallory stuck her head into the hallway where we were and pointed her finger at me. “Don’t say a word.”
I held up my hands. “Me? Never.”
32
***Jake***
When Fiona finally came through the front door, I didn’t get up from my naughty step. Hours had passed. I’d probably called her phone three dozen times and I felt like I had an ulcer from worrying about her. I was frustrated but honestly, I was just glad she was okay. Avery had started mimicking everything I did so when I crossed my arms and frowned, so did he.
Fiona looked at the both of us and raised her eyebrows. “Are you both on the naughty step?”
I nodded. “Yeah. Mallory’s orders. We have been for hours.”
“Mal!” Fiona hurried forward and scooped Avery into her arms. Her sweet scent brushed past me and I wanted desperately to reach out and grab her but I didn’t. “You left Avery sitting on the naughty step for hours?”
Mallory walked in, took one look at me, took another look at Fiona, and took Avery from his mom. “Now it’s your turn to go on the naughty step. I’ve been calling you. Jake’s been calling you. Ryder and Sebastian, too. While you’re thinking about what you did, I’ll call the other two stooges and let them know you’re fine.”
I kept my eyes on my shoes as Fiona sat next to me. Our hips pressed against each other and I felt desperate to pull her into my lap. I had a feeling it wouldn’t be welcomed, though.
She surprised me by leaning her head against my shoulder. “I accidentally went to the apartment. Then I took my time getting back here because I just needed some time to think. Things have changed so fast and I’m feeling a little lost.”
I waited. I didn’t want to rush her or lead her into a conversation away from whatever she had on her mind.
“I lived in a terrible neighborhood that y’all seem to be afraid of but I was never talked to like I was talked to by your ex when I lived there. I’m not okay with how things went. You put me in a position to get abused by a woman you were married to. A woman who still stays at your apartment without you there, apparently.” She looked up at me and I could see that she’d been crying. “I’ve never done any of this. If it’s always going to be like that, I don’t know if I want to.”
Panic filled my gut and the need to word vomit all of the reasons it wouldn’t be like that wanted to escape my mouth but I swallowed and took a deep breath before trying. “I’m sorry. I was trying to minimize damage and I didn’t have your back the way I should’ve. If Lucy hadn’t been involved, I never would’ve gone anywhere with Megan. She’ll be in my life forever, Fiona. Less after Lucy turns eighteen, but she’ll never be gone entirely. I don’t want to promise something I can’t deliver so I won’t say that it’ll always be easy but I can promise to have your back. I fucked up but it won’t happen again.”
“You still let her stay in your apartment, Jake. That’s a little too much for me. I don’t feel safe with you.” She turned away from me and leaned against the wall. “Maybe you and Ryder need to figure things out more before you decide what you want.”
Whether or not it was the smart thing to do, I grabbed her wrist and pulled her to her feet. I hurried up the stairs to the room I knew was hers and closed us in. Pinning her to her bedroom door with my hands braced on either side of her head, I leaned in close. “I don’t need to figure anything out, Fi. I didn’t handle today very well but that doesn’t change anything. I want you. You. I haven’t brought anyone home since the divorce, so I’m going to have to learn where the boundaries are and set them. I can do that. I want to do that. Today was a weird day with finding Lucy drunk but they won’t all be like that.”
Fiona stared up at me with her lips turned down. “What did you see in her? If you liked her, Jake, you can’t possibly like me.”
I narrowed my eyes. “I saw Lucy in her. She made sure of that. I married her for Lucy and nothing else.”
“Is that what you’re trying to do here? With me?”
“Fuck, no, angel. This is different. This is something special. You know it, too. Don’t try to deny it.” I trailed my hands down to her hips and squeezed. “I deserve your doubt. I really did fuck up today. It won’t happen again.”
“This was a really crappy date. I think Ryder’s might have been better and that’s saying something.” She blew out a big breath and pressed her forehead to my chest. “I’m not going to fight your ex-wife for you. She would definitely win. She seems like the type to go for the throat. I don’t want to have to fight for you. I just want to know that you’re here, all the way.”
I cupped her face and brought it up to mine. “I’m here. All the way. I’m a quick learner, angel, and I won’t hurt you again like this. It feels fucking terrible.”
“Is Lucy okay?”
