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“Wow. Tell me how you really feel, Fin.”
He shrugs.
“I assume that you want to come in and talk about what happened?” He nods to my question.
Stepping back so he can come inside, I close the door behind him, walking into my kitchen and picking up a mug, I offer him coffee.
“Nah, I am good. I’ll take a water though.”
Handing him a bottle of water from the fridge, I lean against the counter, looking at him. He doesn’t open the bottle, he just looks at me.
It is like he is reading me, and it freaks me out. Finan is good at watching people, figuring them out to his advantage. I start to feel uncomfortable with how long he is looking at me, studying me, while saying nothing.
“How is he?”
“Do you actually care?”
I spit my drink out at his words and shitty tone.
“Are you fucking serious right now?”
“You are the one who left, Kady.” His arms cross his body, making his already huge biceps bigger.
“Fuck me for freaking the hell out.”
“And Calder didn’t get freaked. Fucking hell, Kady, a kid just got dropped in his lap, and you bolted when he needed you,” he growls.
I blink back at him; I have never, not once, heard this tone come from Finan before. He is the calm, quiet one, but I will not let him walk over me.
“I will not let you force me into thinking that my feelings and fears are not warranted, Finan. If that is the case, then you can fuck off. You know where the door is.”
Placing my mug on the counter top, I cross my arms, mirroring his posture, showing that I will not back down.
“I have every right to feel scared, as well as Calder. For fuck’s sake, if you think that I do not know what he is feeling, then you do not know me at all. I am scared for him, I am shocked for him, but I need time to clear my head too. We are new. Too fucking new to be thinking of adding a baby into our dynamic. Neither of us knows what the hell will happen in the next few weeks, or months, Finan. Right now, his focus should be on the baby.”
“Kane,” he states.
“Sorry, what?” I frown at him.
“He named him Kane.”
I smile, unable to stop it from forming. Fuck.
“I bet he is over the moon it is a boy. I could never imagine Calder being a Girl-Dad.” I laugh, but Finan stays stone face as always.
“My brother can and will be anything he needs to be. It is a shame that you refuse to be by his side to see it.”
That is it.
I have heard enough from him. I understand that he is trying to protect his brother, but my feelings are valid also, but it seems that Finan and I have no doubt, Calder and the club will not see it that way.
Joss and Risky gave me words of understanding yesterday, but I have no clue if they feel the same way now. I also have no clue if I will ever be welcome at the club again after walking away from him.
Just the thought of not being able to go and see my sister there, or any of the girls, makes my stomach sick. I place my hand over my stomach, hoping it will help the unease that I feel.
“Leave.” My voice is low.
He stands there staring at me, his eyes softening a little, but he says nothing.
