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If you think I can’t play your game
You better be right or you might find
You’ve always been playing mine.”
I sashay across the stage, my backup dancers following in a tightly choreographed shadow. Sweat beads all over my body, but I barely feel it. For the last hour, it’s just been me and the music. Me and twenty thousand strangers who were brought together by something that came out of my head and heart. That’s what music is. That’s the power it has, and the reason I will never let anyone take it from me.
“I need your help with this last chorus, Little Rock!” I shout while waving over the crowd. The responding eruption is so thunderous it shakes the floor. I pull out an in-ear monitor so I can absorb the magnificent response while the instrumental echoes around us. The audience gets louder and louder with each beat pushing us toward the explosive climax we feel in our blood.
“They say I’m just another pretty girl with a pretty voice!” I roar over the swelling music. “You know what I say to that?”
The cheering explodes.
A grin breaks on my lips.
I tip the mic back toward me with a vicious smile.
“I’m pretty dang sure they’re wrong!”
I’m accustomed to the rush at this time of the night. Blood racing through my body, senses on high alert, euphoric, limitless energy—none of it is new as I move through the underbelly of the arena after my set. What’s different is the cause of the reaction, which is so much more than the typical performance high I’m used to. This anxiety comes with faces and lingering uncertainty.
Nash is here, yay! I can’t wait to catch up with him and give him a real hug after our initial reunion was cut short by Jarvis’ ego. But that’s not the face haunting me all night. Even on stage, when normally I’m so in the zone nothing can distract me, he did. This thing with Jarvis is annoying, but being out of sync with Val is rocking me to my core.
I remembered too late about the letter I left on my bed. I was going to give it to him tonight anyway, but there was a whole plan that went with it. Part of me has been praying he won’t find it. The other part desperately hopes he has. I don’t trust myself to actually go through with it and everything in there needs to be said.
I know I have a bad track record with men, but Val isn’t just some guy. He’s my person on so many levels and the thought of losing him has been… well, it made me write a letter.
On top of that, I’ve been tormented by my sister’s text earlier today. Her question was totally fair and should have been harmless. Of course she developed a crush on Val and wants his number. She has no reason to think he’s off-limits or that her interest would gut me. If anything, I should be glad we did such a great job hiding our relationship. But “glad” is not the emotion coursing through me at the moment.
“You good?” J-Dawg asks as we approach my bus. “Need anything else?”
This is my first tour with the newest member of my private security detail. He came highly recommended by Nash’s roommate Marcos, and so far has more than lived up to the hype.
“Yes, I’m fine. Thanks, guys.”
“We’ll wait here until roll-out,” Travis says.
“Great, thanks. Hey, uh, one thing maybe.” I bite my lip as the shocking request circles through my mind. Am I really going to do this?
“Everything okay?” J-Dawg asks, his eyes softening with concern. His massive size, shaved head, and endless tattoos make him the perfect intimidating force, but underneath is a teddy bear that makes me feel not just safe, but cared for.
“Yeah, of course. It’s just, Jarvis and I had a little spat. I’d like some time apart from him, so please don’t let him on the bus if he approaches. Tell him I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”
Might as well get them used to this. Once I break things off with Jarvis, we’ll be having this conversation often and in more severe terms.
Their surprised looks don’t surprise me, but I’m glad I said it when a weight immediately lifts. I hadn’t even realized how much his presence drags down my spirit. Funny how Val does the opposite.
“Of course, Ms. Scott,” Travis says, his brow furrowed.
“We got you,” J-Dawg assures me with an emphatic nod.
“Thank you. Really. I so appreciate you all and everything you do.”
“It’s an honor, Ms. Scott,” Travis says.
“Ugh. Why can’t you call me Larinda? I’ve been asking for years.”
A slight smile pulls at the corner of the hard man’s mouth. “Won’t happen, Ms. Scott. Have a nice night.”
